You're Gonna Miss Me
by MissCarolineForbes
Summary: After falling in love with her best friend, Caroline finds out it was all an experiment for Stefan's Psych class. She is so hurt and humiliated, she decides leaving him is the only way to ever get over her feelings for him, so she blows off her college graduation and heads West to forget Stefan. Will she be able to find happiness, or will life lead her back to Stefan? AH Steroline.
1. Chapter 1 Goodbye

**This is the winner of my poll, and I so shouldn't be posting this yet, but I thought what the HECK?! I will post chapter 1 of my new Steroline fic because I'd like to know what you guys think! This chapter is much shorter than the rest will be, and I assure you this is not going to be a song-fic, it just fit for this chapter. Go to youtube and listen to Cups (You're Gonna Miss Me) the Anna Kendrick version, if you haven't already heard it. It will set the scene for this :)**

**I really hope you guys like this! Let me know what you think. **

**-MissCarolineForbes**

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**You're Gonna Miss Me**

**1. Goodbye**

**.**

Caroline isn't sure what she is thinking when she gets up on stage during the Coffee-House she organized, her last event before becoming a college graduate next week, and announces she's going to be making an unscheduled performance. The Coffee-House was an event that took place once a month, a place for students to show off their musical talents, read poetry or original works of writing, and various other performing arts' skills. Caroline was the event coordinator for every one of the Coffee-Houses this year, and tons of other events, but she had never once stolen the spotlight from someone. Not until tonight, that is.

Tonight is different. Today isn't the same as every other day, and this event isn't the same as all the rest. This is her last day here at this school with these people, despite the fact that Graduation isn't until next week. She'll be long gone by then. This is Caroline's 'Goodbye', and she just has to hope that the right person gets the message.

"I, uh, I don't have a cup," Caroline shrugs, adjusting the microphone stand to a better angle, "So I'm going to just...improvise." She breathes in steadily as she starts to clap out a rhythm on her hands and thighs. Then she starts to sing,

"_I got my ticket for the long way 'round. Two bottle o' whiskey for the way. And I sure would like some sweet company, and I'm leaving tomorrow - What do you say?_"

She makes the mistake of looking up at the crowd and making eye contact with the very person she was singing to. Her heart lurches in a painful manner, causing her to falter ever-so-slightly, and she quickly averts her gaze. Damn him for showing up tonight, and with _her_, too. What did she ever do to deserve such a horrible punishment?

"_When I'm gone. When I'm gone. You're gonna miss me when I'm gone. You're gonna miss me by my hair. You're gonna miss me everywhere. Oh, you're gonna miss me when I'm gone._"

Would Stefan miss her? She didn't even know anymore. Last week, she'd have said yes...but last week, she wasn't planning on going anywhere. Last week, she was blissfully happy, and completely unaware that her world was about to be shattered.

"_When I'm gone. When I'm gone. You're gonna miss me when I'm gone. You're gonna miss me by my walk. You're gonna miss me by my talk. Oh, you're gonna miss me when I'm gone."_

He would miss her. Even if he didn't know it yet, he would. Caroline was his best friend, before she stupidly agreed to be his girlfriend, before she stupidly fell in love with him, and before he _stupidly _told her their three-month relationship was an experiment for his Psychology class. _An experiment. _Stefan ruined, destroyed, completely obliterated, their friendship and her heart all in one fell swoop. How could he use her like that? How could he throw away their friendship for an **A** in Psych? Did she really mean so little to him and never know?

Still, they had been friends. Caroline was Stefan's favorite study partner, his most trusted confidante, and his occassional partner-in-crimes, so to speak. They share so many memories that even if Stefan never cared about her romantically, he'd still have to miss the fun times they had together when they were just friends.

When she's gone, and he figures out she's not coming back...he'll realize he's going to miss her.

"_I got my ticket for the long way 'round. The one with the prettiest of views. It's got mountains, it's got rivers, it's got sights to give you shivers, but it sure would be prettier with you._"

She isn't sure where she is going yet, but she packed up all her things from the on-campus apartment she shared with Bonnie and Elena, and loaded the boxes and bags into her car this afternoon. She plans on getting in her car and leaving town directly after this impromptu performance. After that, she's going to just drive until she feels like she's far enough away from Stefan to forget about him, and what he did to her. Maybe she'll drive to California, or Las Vegas, or somewhere in Texas. Hell, if she can afford to get a passport, she'll go to Mexico, or England...

"_When I'm gone. When I'm gone. You're gonna miss me when I'm gone. You're gonna miss me by my walk. You're gonna miss me by my talk. Oh, you're gonna miss me when I'm gone."_

Caroline meets Bonnie's eyes in the crowd, the latter standing off to the side of the stage, tears swimming in her eyes. She feels another surge of emotion since leaving Stefan means leaving Bonnie too, and they've been friends since longer than either knew Stefan. Bonnie understands Caroline's need to get away though, like a true best friend always does, and she's supportive of her decision. They said their goodbyes before the Coffee-House started, and Bonnie promised to keep quiet about Caroline leaving school early until after the weekend, when she'll be sure to be very far away. In turn, Caroline promised to keep in touch with Bonnie, and not to stay away forever.

_"When I'm gone. When I'm gone. You're gonna miss me when I'm gone. You're gonna miss me by my hair. You're gonna miss me everywhere. Oh, you're sure gonna miss me when I'm gone."_

She draws in a shakey breath when she realizes this is the end. She can feel her throat tighten with emotion, because she doesn't really want to leave, doesn't really want any of this to be happening, but she swallows her tears. Caroline finds the strength inside to finish strongly,

_"When I'm gone. When I'm gone. You're gonna miss me when I'm gone. You're gonna miss me by my walk. You're gonna miss me by my talk. Oh, you're gonna miss me when I'm gone."_

As she taps out the last few beats on her jean-clad thighs, she bravely meets Stefan's eyes, and she thinks he does know that she's talking to him. She thinks, for a brief moment, she sees some form of guilt or regret written on his face, but she tears her eyes away. She doesn't want to risk changing her mind, she can't stay here. She _won't _stay here. She tried for a week to see if things could go back to normal, but she is forever changed, and no amount of regret on Stefan's part will fix anything.

"Thanks," Caroline murmurs into the microphone once the applause has died down. She smiles half-heartedly to cover up the fact that she's on the verge of crying, and quickly adds, "I'm gonna miss this place, and all of you; class of 2012!"

The room erupts in another bout of cheers, and Caroline takes this moment to sneak off stage and start towards the exit. When she gets to the door, Bonnie is waiting there, also faking a smile to hide her despair. Caroline walks right into her open arms and they hug each other tight.

"I love you," Bonnie reminds Caroline amidst their embrace, her voice wobbly.

"I love you too," Caroline returns, squeezing her best friend of nearly two decades even tighter. "And I'm going to miss you so much, but I promise we'll talk all the time. And I'll see you soon."

Bonnie reluctantly lets her go, a tear or two escaping from her eyes as she does. "I hope so," Bonnie says, not really believing that she'll see Caroline anytime soon. She has a feeling it's going to be a long time before she sees her blonde friend again. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees someone stand up from their seat, and she warns, "I think Stef is coming over..."

Caroline's blue eyes widen and her heart flutters in panic. "I - I can't," Caroline shakes her head back and forth, "I can't talk to him. I'm sorry...Bye, Bonnie."

Bonnie purses her lips and nods shortly, understanding, but still not liking that she has to leave. "Bye, Caroline. Don't forget your promise."

Caroline resists the urge to look over her shoulder and instead pushes open the outward swinging door and steps out into the night air. It is chilly for mid-May but Caroline doesn't mind, the weather tonight matches her mood; cool and cloudy with a near-definite chance of rain. As she tugs her car keys from the pockets of her jeans, she finally checks behind her to make sure Stefan didn't follow her out. He didn't. Somehow, she is relieved and disappointed at the same time. Relieved because she didn't want to see him and feel her freshly broken heart ache at the sight of him, or have to give him a farewell that he just doesn't deserve. Disappointed because if he had come after her, it would have been proof that he still cared, despite what he said and did to her. But he didn't...he didn't come after her, and he doesn't care.

Caroline locates her car and unlocks the door with a push of a button on her keychain. She opens the door and falls into the driver seat before feeling her composure start to unravel. She takes a deep breath, gripping the steering wheel tightly with both hands, and hoping it will make her calm down. Instead, it has the opposite effect. Her breath catches midway and when she lets it go it comes out as a strangled sob. Tears fill her eyes and she closes them, leaning her head forward until it presses against the backs of her hands on the steering wheel. She allows herself a few moments to grieve over the unfairness of her life, but that is all she can spare. Soon she wipes the tears from her cheeks, starts up the engine of her car, and pulls out of the parking lot. On the road, she follows the signs to the highway, leaving her old life behind and hoping that whatever the future holds will be brighter.

.

Back on campus, Bonnie watches through the small window on the door as Caroline's car drives off down the street. She almost regrets not taking Caroline's offer of joining her, packing up and leaving for an unplanned adventure, because with Caroline out of sight she has the sinking sensation she won't ever see her again. Classes are over, all that's left is Graduation, but still Bonnie chose to stay. This is something Caroline has to do alone, or she'll never move on. At least, that's what Bonnie told herself when she explained her reasons for staying. She can't help feeling like a bad friend for letting her go alone.

"Where'd she go?"

Bonnie turns at the sound of his familiar voice, her expression guarded. Caroline told her not to tell Stefan she was gone, not to say anything to him at all if she could help it, but Bonnie is tempted to disobey her request. She wants to lash out at Stefan, tell him off for everything that he did to Caroline, and make him realize just what he lost. It's his fault she's gone. But she holds her composure.

"She had something to take care of," Bonnie replies, her voice hollow and emotionless.

"She never leaves during one of her events," Stefan comments, studying Bonnie's face closely. He finds pain and anger there, and when she looks out the window once more to the spot where Caroline's car disappeared, he finally gets a clue. "Bonnie, where is she going?"

"Why do you care?" Bonnie asks in exhasperation, "Aren't you here with Elena? Isn't that what you wanted? So why do you care?"

"What do you mean?" Stefan seems truly confused at Bonnie's accusation that he doesn't care about Caroline. It frustrates her all the more. "Why wouldn't I care? She's my friend, I - I just want to know if she's all right."

"No, she's not all right!" Bonnie blurts out, before shaking her head and stepping away from Stefan, trying to find an easy escape route.

Stefan follows though, unable to drop the subject until he knows for sure...He catches up to Bonnie and puts a hand on her shoulder to make her stop. "Wait. Wait Bonnie, please." She sighs loudly, but turns back to look at him, her eyes filled with hate. She's never looked at him like that before. Stefan swallows thickly before asking her to confirm what he already knows, "She's gone, isn't she? She's not coming back."

Bonnie promised she wouldn't tell, so she doesn't say anything. She keeps her mouth shut, but in not denying she gives Stefan exactly what he needed. Her silence speaks louder than words.

"Why?" Stefan asks, his shoulders sinking in defeat. He knew Caroline had been avoiding him, that she was acting differently, but he had no idea she was planning on taking off. She told him she just needed time, that everything would go back to normal, and _they _would be okay. He believed her, but he shouldn't have, because it was the biggest lie she ever told. "It's because of me, isn't it?"

Bonnie raises an eyebrow in a way that claims, 'who else's fault could it be?' She has no patience for this right now. What does Stefan want from her? A trophy? Because he figured out that Caroline left the moment it happened and not three days later, like Caroline hoped? Because he actually connected the dots and proved he's not a completely brainless male?

"You used her, Stefan." Bonnie's words are delivered in a harsh and concise manner, "You turned her life into a psych experiment. You humiliated her. How did you expect her to feel? What did you think would happen? Was she supposed to pretend the past three months didn't happen? She fell in love with you, Stefan, she _loved you._ And you basically told her she meant nothing to you. Of course she's gone." With one last disdainful look, Bonnie shrugs his hand off her shoulder and disappears into the crowd gathered in front of the stage for the next performance.

Stefan can't describe the feeling that comes over him when he realizes that Caroline is gone because of him. He feels as though he just woke up from a long sleep, and nothing is as it should be. He thought telling Caroline the truth about his Psychology assignment was the right thing to do, but now he sees how wrong it was, not just telling her about it but doing it in the first place. Why did he think Caroline was the right person to be his guinea pig? Just because she's always so bubbly and care-free and _there for him _doesn't mean he had the right to take advantage of her. He convinced himself that once the project was over, and he proved to Caroline her feelings were all invented in a survivalist instinct to keep their friendship intact, she would understand. But in trying to save a friendship and earn an A, he ruined the best friendship he ever had. He lost his best friend.

With the world still feeling like it is crashing all around him, Stefan runs outside and pulls his cell phone out, trying to contact Caroline. Her phone rings and rings but she doesn't pick up. He tries again, but still no answer. Once more, and her phone goes straight to voicemail. She is ignoring his calls.

Desperately, Stefan leaves a message expressing his deepest apologies and begging her to come back. He knows it won't work, she's too hurt, but he has to try. He can make all of this better if she gives him a second chance. He doesn't deserve one, but he wants one so bad, more bad than he's ever wanted anything in his entire life. His apology is sincere and heartfelt, and might even have made Caroline stop and question her decision to leave Virginia...

If she were to hear it. But she wouldn't hear it, not now, not ever. The moment Caroline sees Stefan's name flash across her caller ID, she panics. She pulls her car over to the side of the road and stares down debating whether or not to pick up. She decides not to, and then confirms that decision when he calls a second time, and she ignores that too. She finally turns the phone off, and, just for good measure...she tosses it out the window.

Caroline nods once at her decision to ditch her cell, accepting that she doesn't need it anyways and it'll only tempt her to contact Stefan somehow, and then signals her car back onto the road. She is almost to the highway now. She's heading West, still no destination in mind. She thought she'd be a little more nervous, she's never actually been on her own before, since even in college she roomed with two of her closest friends from Mystic Falls. She's anxious, but somewhat excited. Being on her own could be kind of fun. What choice does she have?


	2. Chapter 2 Fresh & Dangerous

**Thanks so much for the feedback! You guys rock! I am totally assured now that you're all going to love this story, and I was so excited to hear it that I finished up Chapter 2 real quick. I'll be updating The Only Exception next though, so Chapter 3 for this will be out after that.**

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**You're Gonna Miss Me**

**2. Fresh & Dangerous**

**.**

**January 2012**

**.**

When Caroline sees Stefan walk into the cafeteria and head straight for the breakfast line, to say that she was relieved would be an epic understatement. Why exactly is she so relieved to see her fully grown and completely capable, independent friend Stefan? Well, this would have been Day Four that she hasn't seen or heard from him, if he hadn't just made an appearance in her morning, and that is highly unusual. Since starting college four years ago, they've seen each other or at least talked almost every day. Stefan hadn't even had his phone on, nor had he been online, and no one has seen him. That would be why Caroline is crossing the cafeteria floor right now, to discover the reason for his strange disappearance.

"Stefan, hey!" Caroline calls out as she pushes past the other students in line, not even realizing how rude she must seem. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Care," Stefan greets, nodding his head absently in her direction as he loads his tray up with an assortment of breakfast items: a blueberry muffin, cereal, waffles, yogurt, fruit cup, coffee, and orange juice. Caroline waits semi-patiently to the side while he pays, discreetly taking in his appearance as she does. He's wearing the same clothes he was when she saw him three days ago, only now they're wrinkled and covered in dirt. His eyes are dark and saggy, like he hasn't slept. This is so not doing much to ease her concern.

"Okay," Caroline tugs Stefan towards the glass doors leading out to the patio, and demands, "Seriously, why do you look like you crawled out of a hole? Were you abducted? What the fuck happened to you?"

Without lifting his eyes from his food, Stefan laughs, actually _laughs_, and tells her to, "Calm down. Of course I wasn't abducted." Then he proceeds to shovel forkfuls of food into his mouth without any other explanation. Assuming that he must be starving, Caroline remains quiet for the six or seven minutes it takes him to clear his plate, and then demands answers.

Reaching across the table, Caroline puts a hand on Stefan's wrist to get his attention. He finally looks at her, and sees how concerned she is. "Stefan, I've been worried about you. Please, tell me where you've been."

"Come on then," Stefan agrees after deciding the patio is too crowded to talk, "I have to go home and shower. I'll tell you on the way."

Caroline nods, her patience wearing thin, and follows Stefan to the garbage as he dumps his trash and leaves the tray in the basket of other dirty dishes. The two head in the direction of Stefan's apartment, which is a five minute walk from the cafeteria. He informs her that what he's about to tell her is confidential and she can't tell anyone else, not even Bonnie or Elena. She assures him his secret is safe with her.

"It was for Psych class," Stefan says, as if that explains everything. To Caroline's blank expression, he continues, "Do you remember I was telling you about my new professor?"

Caroline nods, "The one who insists you all call him Silas, and scared half his class off the first day? Yeah, I _vaguely _remember you telling me about him." She rolls her blue eyes, urging him to keep going.

"Yes. Well, Silas gave us our first test, and I passed." Stefan again acts as though his revelation holds all the answers.

"Did your test involve murder and grave-digging?" Caroline wonders, "Because if not, I'm going to need a little more detail."

Stefan continues as if she hadn't said anything, his focus on climbing the stairs to his apartment. "Last week, he assigned us a two-page paper on our biggest fear. He said most of us wouldn't write about our real fear, that we'd be too scared to put ourselves in such a vulnerable position; it's a natural defense mechanism, he said. After we turned our papers in, he told us he would make a bet that all of us did write about our real fears, because he is an authority figure and we all have it in us to defy the man. I don't know about everyone else, but I was honest. And I think Silas was right; I did write the truth because I wanted to prove him wrong."

Unlocking the door with the key, Stefan lets himself and Caroline inside his one-bedroom, single person apartment. He isn't really a roommate person, so he opted out of that experience. He likes his privacy, but that doesn't mean he's a hermit. Caroline is a frequent visitor, stopping by to study, harass him into cooking her dinner, or just to watch a movie. She also drags him out to various social events, most of which she planned herself. Stefan would like to think he'd still have as many friends as he does without Caroline, but he doesn't think that's true.

Caroline tosses her messenger bag on Stefan's couch and trails after him into his bedroom. He kicks off his sneakers and starts to undress, which she pretends she doesn't notice as she flops carelessly on his neatly made bed. Stefan throws his dirty long sleeved shirt and jeans at the top of his hamper, that is full since he missed his usual laundry day, and takes a clean outfit out of his dresser. He can feel Caroline's eyes on his back, watching him, and he finally turns to look at her, folding his arms across his bare chest.

"You're staring," Stefan points out, his tone light and teasing.

"I'm waiting," Caroline corrects, "There's a difference. And you look like shit, Stef, so sorry if that's a blow to your ego but I wasn't staring like _that_." Although, if Caroline is being honest with herself, Stefan still looks good even dirty and spent. He has such a perfectly sculpted body it would be hard not to stare, and even though they've been friends for seven years now Caroline still appreciates his bulging muscles and handsome looks. It's just that she's put Stefan in this off-limits, friends-only, non-sexual box, and she refuses to take him out because it would completely ruin their friendship. Besides, Stefan doesn't see Care as anything more than a really close, trusted friend, and she's pretty sure he's in love with Elena, although he hasn't admitted it.

"I _am _trying to go take a shower," Stefan reminds, "But _someone _won't let me."

"Unless you want me to follow you in the shower," Caroline warns, "You better start talking, Mister Salvatore." Caroline might be used to seeing Stefan in next to nothing, but she's never actually seen him nude, and while she hopes it doesn't get to that she will follow his ass into the bathroom to get him to spill on this Professor Silas thing. She's not about to wait another twenty minutes, or however long it takes for him to get himself clean. She wants to know the scoop, like, **now**.

"All right," Stefan relents, leaning his back against his dresser for a moment, but then feeling the cool wood on his skin makes him straighten up again, "I'll give you the short version. Then I get to take a shower. If you want to hear more after that, you can wait."

Caroline wants to complain, but she finds herself nodding and agreeing, "Fine."

"Silas basically challenged us to face our fears. Thursday at the end of class, he passed out our assignment, with instructions to meet Friday night if we accepted. I was the first to show up. I handed over my phone, and waited. Most of the class showed, but not everyone. We got on a bus and drove a couple hours, it must have been South; Georgia, probably."

Caroline interrupts here, "What do you mean '_probably_'? You didn't pay attention to where you were going?"

Stefan knew she was going to say something, but he also knows she's going to start freaking out if he tells her everything that happened over the weekend. He tries to remain casual as he explains they were blindfolded, and then he hurries on to say, "It was fine, Care. We all signed releases. We knew what we were doing."

Caroline raises a skeptical eyebrow, but waves him on, "Whatever you say..."

"Anyways," He gives his friend a stern look, silently telling her if she doesn't shut up he won't finish his story, "Once we got to the place - an old, out-of-use hospital - we were split up. I was given a small backpack of supplies and...locked in a, uh, cell in the basement." Stefan frowns when he hears how bad that sounds out loud.

"Please tell me you're joking," Caroline says seriously, sitting up from her previously relaxed position on his bed. She studies his face and knows he's not. Stefan doesn't really joke too often, especially not about things like this. "You're not joking. Your professor _locked you_ in a _cell? _And you said I shouldn't have been worried."

"Yes, and I'm fine," Stefan claims, "I faced my fear: I was trapped for three days, and I'm still alive. Silas might be radical, but he's brilliant, Caroline. I don't expect you to understand, but he is a master of Psychology, and being in his class is a once in a lifetime opportunity. I didn't want to waste it."

Caroline isn't convinced, "I'm not sure brilliant is the word I'd use to describe forcing students to face their worst fears, Stef...It sounds more like psy_chotic_ to me. And possibly illegal, seeing how he locked you up and practically starved you -"

"He didn't starve me," Stefan insists, restating firmly, "Caroline, I'm fine. Stop overreacting. I'm going to take a shower now, okay? If you're still here after..." He sighs, "Then I'll answer whatever else you want to know."

When he closes the door to the bathroom and Caroline hears the water turn on a few seconds later, she debates leaving simply because Stefan told her she was overreacting. She's so not overreacting. Stefan is _under_-reacting. But he says he's fine, and Stefan can handle himself. He's smart, and he doesn't usually get himself in trouble. She has to trust him. She's not his mother or his girlfriend, she's his friend, and friends are supportive.

Stefan isn't surprised when he opens the bathroom door thirty minutes later and sees Caroline sprawled out on his bed watching TV. He knew she'd be too curious to leave. He feels the exhaustion set in now that he's filled his stomach, showered, and his bed is in plain sight. He motions for Caroline to scoot over, before falling into the bed with a loud and content sigh, which makes Caroline laugh. He hasn't been in his bed for three whole nights; his bed was a dirty cement floor. It was the worst experience, but he passed the test. He's proud of himself.

Stifling a yawn, Stefan asks, "Okay, what do you want to know?"

Astonishingly, Caroline shrugs, "I think you covered all the basics. I'm not going to give you the third degree. As long as you promise you're not mentally scarred from this experience, I _guess_ I don't have to report to the school administration that there's a looney-bird teaching Pysch." She smirks. Then she realizes, "Plus, you're really tired, so I don't want to be a pain in the ass."

"You?" Stefan pretends to be shocked, "Never." He laughs when she jabs him in the ribs with her elbow. "I'm serious. You're never a pain in my ass. You can stay," He offers, "But I am two seconds away from the best sleep of my life..."

To prove his point, Stefan slides his body under his blankets and fluffs his pillow before resting his head and closing his eyes. Caroline suddenly throws her arms around him and squeezes, "I'm glad you're okay, Stefan." She might have held him a second longer than she normally does, but it's not every weekend that Stefan goes missing.

**.**

**May 2012**

**.**

After leaving Virginia behind, Caroline drives about twelve hours West before pulling over at around eight in the morning, at a motel in St. Louis, Missouri. She is utterly exhausted and thinking entirely too much about Stefan and his crazy Psych professor and that awful nightmare weekend Stefan suffered through his first month with Professor Silas. Stefan had to face his fear of being trapped, by being locked in a cell in the basement of a creepy, abandoned psychiatric hospital for three whole nights and three whole days. Back then, she and Stefan were still just friends, and things were considerably less complicated. She'd thought Silas' teaching methods were unethical and off-base, but Stefan practically worshipped him. Maybe she should have realized sooner that something was going on. She should have known better than to think Stefan's feelings for her actually changed...

To end the cycle of blaming Stefan, blaming Professor Silas, and then blaming herself, Caroline assumes sleep is her best option. She checks into a quiet, but clean, motel and pays twenty-four dollars for the day and night, although she doesn't plan on staying for that long. She has to pay an extra six dollars to get in the room before eleven, but she is too tired to mind. Caroline takes her purse and her pillow into the motel with her, and leaves everything else locked up in her car. She thought she'd fall asleep the minute her head hit the pillow, but she was wrong. After a good, long cry, sleep finally takes her.

Caroline awakens twelve hours later feeling well-rested and anxious to leave. She packs her pillow back into her car, checks-out at the front desk, and continues on her way. She is still far too close to Stefan, so she plans to keep on driving until she finds herself in a place she'd like to be. She is back on the highway by nine o'clock, and drives through the night until morning. When her stomach calls to her in hunger, she answers it by stopping for breakfast at a small but delicious joint called the Egg & I, just inside Denver, Colorado. After eating her fill, she hits the road again, intent on driving straight through until reaching her final destination.

After crossing through Colorado to Utah, Caroline unconsciously merges onto a different freeway, one leading southwest; to Las Vegas. When she is made aware of this fact, she is already nearly there, and anticipation builds up in the pit of her stomach. She really did it, she left Virginia, and she drove across almost the entire country! She always wanted to go on a road trip, but she had hoped it would be in the company of her friends, not on her own. Still, Las Vegas is on Caroline's list of Top Five cities she'd like to visit in the U.S., and she's about to be able to cross it off and boast that she's been to the Sin City.

Driving down Las Vegas Boulevard at close to ten o'clock at night was probably the best decision Caroline ever made, and it wasn't even done on purpose. She just happened to arrive at the peak moment when the whole street is lit up like Christmas and the outrageous nightlife activities have only begun. There is so much commotion, so many cars and taxis and buses on the streets; so much to look at, that Caroline nearly runs over a pedestrian. Luckily, she caught herself, and avoided an accident, but it was a wake-up call that maybe she's been behind the wheel for too long. She avoids the bigger, recognizable hotel casinos, knowing already they're too much for her price range, and instead pulls into a less flashy hotel, one with a bar but not a full casino inside. She checks-in for one-night only, to test the waters here in Las Vegas, before deciding whether or not to stay a while.

The first thing Caroline does once she gets up to her room is call Bonnie from the land-line. Since she threw her cell phone out the window Friday night, she assumes Bonnie is getting a little worried, especially after she insisted she'd call every night and she hasn't. It's now Sunday night, and if tonight is like every other Sunday night, Bonnie just finished watching Game of Thrones with Elena, and they're probably discussing details. If tonight is _unlike _every other Sunday night, Bonnie could be watching alone, because Elena is with Stefan now.

Caroline nearly hangs up the phone at the thought of Elena and Stefan being at the apartment when she calls Bonnie, but it has already started to ring, so she stays connected.

Five or six rings later, Bonnie finally answers the phone, her voice groggy and sleep-filled, "…Hello?"

Caroline double-checks the clock as she sinks into the hotel bed, and demands, "What are doing? Sleeping already?"

"Care?" Bonnie sounds a little more alert now, but still confused. "It's…it's one in the morning, Care, of course I'm sleeping. Where are you?"

A light goes off in Caroline's head, and she voices, "Ohh, right! I forgot about the time difference…it's only ten here."

"Where?" Bonnie demands, now fully and completely awake.

"Las Vegas," Caroline states almost smugly, "I just checked into a hotel like ten minutes ago. It's amazing here, Bonnie, you have no idea. I wish you were here."

"Me too," Bonnie agrees wistfully, again wondering if she should have left Virginia with Caroline. "I can't believe you're in Las Vegas!" After a short pause, she rattles off the remaining questions she has for Caroline, "What happened to your cell phone? I tried calling a million times. Are you planning on staying in Vegas? Do you think that's a good idea? What will you do there?"

"I threw my cell phone out the window back in Virginia," Caroline admits, chuckling over her hasty decision. She doesn't regret it though, not really. Now there's no way for Stefan to call or text her, no way for him to guilt-trip her into going back, or explaining her reasons for leaving. "I'll get a new one eventually. I don't know yet how long I'll stay, but I figure I'll be here for a little while. I can't exactly see all the sights in one night. I want to walk the Strip, gamble a little, and maybe sneak my way into a Showgirl performance…" She is kidding about the last part, but that would be fun.

"Caroline," Bonnie starts in that responsible, motherly voice of hers, "I don't know if Las Vegas is the best place for you to be right now, especially by yourself. There's a lot of trouble there, and I'm worried for you…I don't want you to get yourself involved in a situation you can't get out of. When are you coming home?"

"I _just left_, Bonnie," Caroline reminds, albeit a little impatiently, "I don't know when I'm coming back. You don't have to worry about me; I can take care of myself. I'll be fine. Now that I'm here, I'll have a phone to call you, and I'll keep my promise. You'll know what I'm doing, and you'll know that I'm okay. Just trust me, Bonnie."

"All right, Care," Bonnie sighs, "But come home soon. I miss you already. And…"

Caroline senses Bonnie is about to bring up something involving Stefan, or possible Elena, maybe even Stefan and Elena, and that is not something she wants to know anything about. She cuts her off, "I don't want to know, Bon, I don't. Please? I want to go take a shower, change into a sexy, little black dress, and go down to the bar for a much-needed drink."

"Have fun," Bonnie manages to wish her well, "and stay safe. I miss you."

"Miss you too," Caroline returns before setting the phone back on the hook.

Caroline does exactly as she told Bonnie she would; she showers, puts on her sexiest black dress, and slinks down to the bar, where she orders two shots of tequila and drinks them straight up. She's never really been a tequila fan, but she's been told it does wonders for a broken-heart. She's also been told it is the perfect prelude to a night of wild sex, but she doesn't think that will be happening tonight.

Across the bar, Caroline sees a man staring in her direction. He has raven hair and piercing ice blue eyes. He appears to be in his late twenties, possibly early-thirties, wearing a white t-shirt underneath a worn leather jacket. He sends a sexy smirk in Caroline's direction at the same moment as the bar-tender places another shot of tequila on the bar-top.

"From the gentleman over there, Miss Forbes," The bar-tender explains, tipping his head in the direction of Mr. Hott and Dangerous.

"Thank you," Caroline says, catching eyes once more with the man across the room. She smiles and holds the shot glass out to him in a 'cheers' gesture, and then tosses the drink to the back of her throat. When she looks back, he's not there anymore. She feels slightly disappointed for a moment, like, _of course_, the first guy to show her attention changes his mind without even talking to her...

"Looking for me?"

She spins on the bar stool and finds herself face-to-face with the blue-eyed man, who is even more attractive up close than he was far away. She smiles coyly and nods, the first effects of the alcohol sinking in and making her feel comfortable and at ease. Not enough to make her forget that she's here to escape from Stefan, but enough to allow her to flirt with a stranger and enjoy herself.

"Thanks for the..." Caroline gestures at the empty shot glass in her hand before placing it on the counter-top of the bar. "I'm Caroline," She indroduces, smile widening to show her teeth off.

"You're most welcome, Caroline," He responds, sliding onto the empty bar stool next to hers, "Damon." After a brief pause, he asks, "How long have you been in Vegas?"

"Actually, I just got here an hour ago."

"No way, so you're fresh off the plane," Damon comments, "And by yourself, too? I have to ask then: Business or pleasure?"

Caroline doesn't correct that she's actually fresh out of her car, not off a plane, but...she figures it doesn't make much of a difference. Normal people would have flown from Virginia to Vegas, and Damon doesn't need to know her whole life story. She does, however, admit that she's here for pleasure, for herself, not for business, or anybody else.

"Sounds like you need another drink," Damon waves over the bar-tender and orders himself a bourbon. He tells Caroline to get whatever she likes, and she decides on a mojito. While they wait, Damon asks her where she's from and what brings her to Vegas.

"I'm from Virginia," Caroline answers, before quickly deciding, "But I don't want to talk about home." She shrugs unapologetically, something she wouldn't have done if she hadn't injested three shots of tequila prior to this conversation. "I came here to..._escape._"

"Fine with me," Damon agrees to her condition, throwing down a tip for the bar-tender when he slides over his and Caroline's drinks. He takes a gulp of bourbon, watching the blonde beside him as she sips from her mojito through the tiny straw. He thinks she's pretty, beautiful even, and definitely innocent, but possibly with a wild side. He's not sure, but he'd like to find out. He'd like to corrupt her a little. It might be fun.

Caroline feels Damon's hand slide over the leather back of her bar stool as she takes the last sip from her drink. She raises her eyes slowly, surprised to find him suddenly so close to her. In a low and husky voice, Damon offers to take Caroline somewhere much more exciting than the hotel bar. At first, she thinks he's asking her to take off with him so they can fuck, but he assures her he wants to take her _out _not _in _for the night. Apparently in Vegas, no one goes to sleep until the sun comes up; at least, Damon doesn't.

Caroline contemplates Damon's offer, aware even in her drunken state that he never said he wouldn't try and take her home with him at some point. She doesn't know if she should put herself in that position, seeing how vulnerable she is at the moment. But then she kind of thinks, _Fuck it! _she's a twenty-two year old, independent woman. She can have shameless and unattached sex with a hot stranger, if she so chooses. She then wonders if it would make Stefan jealous, and actually grins when she decides that he would be furious. He would, too, even if they hadn't fake-dated-or-whatever-he'd-call-it the past three months. Damon is the exact kind of man Stefan would hate, and that makes Caroline think he's the perfect mistake to make right now.

"Sure," Caroline agrees, taking Damon's out-stretched hand, "Let's go."

**.**

**Thanks for reading:) Reviews would be awesome, which I know you all already are, soo it would just be adding to your awesomeness;)**

**FYI: Damon and Stefan are NOT brothers in this story. I was gonna have it be like a 'plot twist' that he is Stefan's brother, and she figures it out, but that just doesn't work for this story. I wanted Damon in it though, so voila, here he is:)**

**-MissCarolineForbes**


	3. Chapter 3 More Than Sure

**Heyyy! I'm back! Sorry for disappearing...*hides behind computer to avoid rotten tomatoes*...I have no excuse except my summer was busy and writing was not at the front of my mind. But I promise I didn't give up on any of my stories. This one was the first one I chose to update because the chapter came to me easiest. Plus, I know exactly where I want this story to go and I saw (and heard from my awesome reviewers) that someone posted a similar story, only with a Klaus/Caroline pairing, so I was like 'damn, I gotta update mine!' So that's what I'm doing :)**

**Thanks sooo sooo much for all the reviews, follows, and faves! You guys are awesome, and your reviews make me smile. I can't wait to hear what you think of this chapter :)**

**-MissCarolineForbes**

* * *

**You're Gonna Miss Me**

**3. More Than Sure**

**.**

That night, Damon gave Caroline a tour of his favorite places on the Las Vegas Strip, and coming from a 'seasoned veteran' like himself it was a Hell of a tour. Their first stop was at the MGM Grand, the largest of the Las Vegas casinos, and the spot Damon decided would be best for him to show Caroline her way around. She'd never been to a casino before, and he'd been to...well, all of them. They didn't win anything there, but they broke even, which Damon said was a good thing. Second stop on the tour was at the Bellagio, where they arrived just in time to watch the last fountain show at midnight. It was one of the only shows worth watching, Damon had told her, and it was completely free; over one-thousand sprinkler heads spread strategically across a giant lake shoot water nearly five-hundred feet into the air, and all of it choreographed to a Frank Sinatra song. It was so exciting, and Caroline felt something spark inside her, and when she told Damon he said she must have caught what he likes to call 'Lady Luck Fever'. He insisted she pick a game, and make some bets, because she was going to win big. Caroline wanted to be skeptical, but she did as he told, and to her surprise he was right; Caroline had caught a bit of the Lady Luck, and she walked away from the Bellagio $5,000 richer! Next stop on the tour was Caesars Palace, which was so beautiful in the lobby alone that Caroline swore she never wanted to leave. They decided to grab a bite to eat at the Munchbar, where they split some Mahi Mahi Fish Tacos and had a couple more drinks. After that, Caroline was ready to go anywhere Damon wanted to take her...

"So," Caroline prompts as she walks unsteadily beside Damon through the breath-taking lobby of Caesars Palace, "What's next, Mister Vegas? Any other hidden gems you're dying to show me before this tour is over?"

"It's 'Mister De Luca'," Damon corrects as he throws an arm around his blonde companion to steady her out, "And yes, actually; there was one more thing I wanted to show you, but it won't be happening for..." He checks the expensive-looking watch around his wrist, "another hour and a half. So, what should we do until then?" He smirks suggestively.

Caroline blushes under Damon's intense blue-eyed gaze, but the alcohol she's consumed has made her brave, and she suggests boldly, "We could go back to my hotel."

"Really?" Damon's eyebrows shoot up as he fakes his surprise. He scans for an available taxi as he comments wryly, "Why Blondie, what would we do there?"

Caroline would normally be infuriated by this kind of comment from a man, but tonight she takes the challenge. She sees that Damon has already signaled for a cab, so she captures his attention by sliding her hands up his sides before wrapping them around his neck. She presses her chest against his and bats her eyelashes as she promises, "There's _plenty _we could do, Damon." She seals her comment with a kiss, and then adds with a slight bite, "Just don't call me Blondie."

Damon chuckles as he opens the door to the cab for her, and he gestures for her to slide in. "I guess I can do that," Damon agrees with a slow grin. He climbs inside the car and shuts the door, directing the cab driver to Caroline's hotel. Then he traps Caroline in his arms and captures her lips with his.

Caroline is nearly completely absorbed in Damon's kiss, and she notices three things in this order: his clean, athletic cologne is pleasant and not too strong for her nose, she's never made-out in the back of a taxi before, and Damon is clearly much more dominant and controlling than Stefan ever was. At the thought of Stefan, Caroline has a moment of doubt. Maybe she's not ready to be doing this so soon after being broken up with, whether it was real to Stefan or not. Maybe she is only going to be hurting herself in the end, another dumb decision made on behalf of Caroline Forbes. What if...?

As soon as the moment comes, it goes, and Caroline is no longer worried about the consequences of sleeping with Damon De Luca. She kisses him with new resolve, sucking his bottom lip into her mouth and nibbling it playfully to show him she's got a dominant side too. Damon groans and squeezes her hips, his fingers then running down to the bottom of her little black dress, dancing across the skin of her thighs. The cab slows, and they are interrupted by the cab driver, who announces they've arrived. Damon pays the driver, and then he snakes his arm around Caroline possessively and leads her inside. In the elevator, Caroline realizes this is _really happening_, and Stefan's face flashes across her eyelids once more as she compares him to her current date, but then the pain that accompanies thoughts of Stefan lately causes her to shut them all out. She doesn't want to think about Stefan, that's why she drove all the way to Las Vegas! She _is _going to sleep with Damon, and not just to keep Stefan from her mind - okay, well mostly because of that, - but because in her entire four years of college she didn't have a single one-night-stand. Call it shallow or what you will, but Caroline has one more night before Graduation, and even though she's not going to be there for the actual ceremony it will count to her; she's doing it for the life experience.

_Or maybe I'm going to start fucking with every guy's heart that I meet in a pathetic attempt to get back at Stefan, _Caroline considers before rolling her eyes and concluding, _Nope. I think one broken heart in this mess is plenty._

At the door to Caroline's hotel room, Damon notices the beautiful blonde looks distracted, so he pauses her hand when it is poised at the door handle and looks her in the eyes carefully as he asks, "Are you sure about this?"

Caroline hesitates, his words bringing a very unwanted memory to the fore-front of her mind, especially when her response is the same that Stefan's had been to her when she asked him the exact question, "I'm more than sure."

**.**

**January 2012**

**.**

It was less than a full week after Stefan's three-day disappearance, the Friday after to be exact, and the night of the first Coffee-House since returning from Winter break. The Coffee-House went great and both Bonnie and Elena had attended, so the three girls decided to go to a party at the Phi Beta Kappa house afterwards. Caroline had been hanging out with one of the brothers of the fraternity for most of the night, a cute Senior named Joey, and she was hoping to get laid since it's been longer than she'd like to admit. It was going well, really well, but Caroline barely got one kiss out of him before he was pushing her away and announcing she was really pretty and he liked her, but he just wasn't going to do 'Stefan's girl like that'.

"Excuse me?" Caroline asks, blinking at Joey in confusion because surely she must have heard him wrong, or else she's much drunker than she thought she was.

"Yeah," Joey confirms, "Everyone knows you're Salvatore's girl, and Stefan's cool. I mean, you're cool too, but I can't do this." He backs away from Caroline slowly, shrugging apologetically as he does.

"What?" Caroline shakes her head, slowly coming to her senses when she realizes he's seriously rejecting her, "B-but Joey, I'm not - We're not...Stefan is my -"

"Boyfriend, I know," Joey butts in frustratingly. "Caroline, it's cool. I'm not gonna tell him about the kiss. It never happened." He squeezes between a couple who are dancing closely and then ducks around a group of guys who are blocking the doorway of the living room. Then he's gone.

Caroline huffs in annoyance, "But he's _not _my boyfriend." Caroline sighs because she knows Joey didn't hear and no one else is listening. "Argh! Stupid Stefan!" She twirls around and stomps into the trashed kitchen, nearly slipping on the floor that is slick with spilled beer from a very messy game of beer pong. After swiping a bottle from the counter, she twists off the cap and takes a long swig of lukewarm rum. She grimaces as she pulls the bottle away from her lips, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand as she does.

"Here." A cup is offered in front of her face, and Elena explains with a smile, "Pepsi. It helps to have a chaser when you're guzzling down the hard stuff like a legit alcoholic." Caroline gratefully takes a sip of soda to get rid of the nasty taste in her mouth. "Was that you I heard yelling something about 'stupid Stefan'?"

Caroline giggles before realizing it's not very funny and then pouts as she returns to the bottle of rum. She chases it with the soda, telling Elena, "I'm probably going to need this." Elena nods, smiling sympathetically and waiting for an explanation. "God Elena, I'm so horny! All I wanted to do was get laid tonight, but do I get that? No! Because all the friggin' guys here think I'm stupid Stefan's girlfriend!"

Elena tries to hold it together, but she ends up doubled over in laughter, which leads Caroline to another large shot straight from the rum bottle. She sputters and Elena grabs the bottle from her, shooting her a look as she forbids, "You are not drinking any more, Care. I think you've had enough. And I'm sorry, I didn't mean to laugh, but come on - Who actually thinks that you and Stefan are together? That's crazy."

"I know, right?!" Caroline concurs enthusiastically; glad her friend sees things her way. "What do I do? I can't go the rest of the year without sex because all the cute guys think I'm with Stefan."

"No," Elena shakes her head, "No you can't." She hums thoughtfully before concluding, "You have to talk to Stefan. Tell him to fix this problem."

"Yeah," Caroline nods, her outlook brightening a bit, "You're right. Oh my God, Elena. You're like a total genius." That might be the alcohol talking a little bit..."I'm so going to go talk to Stefan. _Now_. I'm going to talk to him now."

"Are you sure?" Elena asks, tipping her head to the side, "Do you think that's a good idea? You're pretty drunk, Care..."

Caroline is already reaching for the door though, and she smiles over her shoulder at Elena, "Thanks, Lena! I'll see you tomorrow!"

"Bye Care," Elena waves. She watches Caroline stumble down the stairs, but the blonde straightens up quickly and shoots her friend a sheepish grin and a thumbs up to show she's all right. Elena covers her mouth to hide her laughter and shakes her head slightly, wondering to herself if Caroline will even make it to Stefan's place tonight, and if she does what will happen…

"Ow!" Caroline winces as she feels a pinch on the bottom of her bare foot; she had been wearing heels but they started hurting so she took them off and continued her trek barefoot. She drops to her butt on the top stair of the apartment building it took her close to ten minutes to walk to and examines her foot. "Fuck," She groans when she sees a small pointy pebble has imbedded itself in the heel of her foot. She pulls it out and a few drops of blood bubble to the surface. She frowns at it, internally blaming Stefan for this too, like he himself placed the sharp pebble in her path so she'd cut her foot after being denied sex from a really cute and available guy. She gets up with new resolve and lets herself inside the front doors of the apartment complex, stomping up to Stefan's second floor with purpose

When she arrives at Stefan's door, she knocks insistently, grumbling out loud, "You better be here, Stefan Salvatore, or I swear to God, I'm gonna –"

The door swings open then, and Caroline's threat dies on her tongue when she sees her very handsome friend standing there in only a towel, which is hung very low on his waist, still dripping wet from the shower she clearly interrupted. He raises an eyebrow at her, silently asking what she's doing there and why she's pounding on his door like a killer is chasing her. Caroline wobbles on her feet, reaching out for the doorframe with one hand to steady herself, and then she glares at Stefan. He watches her humorously, finally asking, "Care…what are you doing here?"

"_You_," Caroline begins accusingly, jabbing Stefan's shoulder with her finger as she invites herself inside, "ruined my night!" She hobbles over to the couch, where she tosses her shoes to the floor and sits to check out her foot again.

"Uh…" Stefan pushes the door shut and then turns around to look at her, clearly confused, "How did I do that exactly?"

Caroline sighs in frustration, not able to comprehend why Stefan doesn't already know what he did. She quickly explains the situation to him, her usual dramatics amped up even more thanks to the heavy alcohol consumption this evening. "I was at the Phi Beta Kappa house with Bonnie and Elena. Everything was cool; I was having a _really _great time, Joey was dancing with me, and I was so going to get some, or so I thought. But no. No, Stefan, I didn't get any, because of you! And then he's like 'it's cool though, because you're cool and he's cool, and I won't tell so it's cool'." Stefan is totally lost at this point, but he knows there's no stopping Caroline until she's finished. "Guess what? _It's not cool! _And then he left before I could even tell him he was wrong, so I turned to the rum, but _Elena _told me I had to come talk to you. So here I am. And I cut my foot on a stupid pebble outside your place, and it's all your fault. All of this is your fault, Stefan. It's not fair!"

"Okay," Stefan cuts in before she starts rambling some more, "I'm sorry. You're going to have to tell me again how any of that is my fault though. But first, come here." He takes her hand and pulls her to her feet, leading the way to his bathroom, which is steamy from his recent shower. He pats the countertop of his sink, and Caroline hops up. Stefan gently takes her foot in his hand and looks at the small cut. He rinses her foot under the faucet, pats it dry with a clean towel, and then places a band-aid on her heel. All the while, Caroline sits quietly and watches him, trying not to notice just how sexy he is right now. _It's only because I'm sex-starved, _Caroline thinks to herself, _Not because I want to jump my best friends bones. _"There," Stefan comments, causing Caroline's eyes to snap up to his face in surprise, "All set."

Caroline nods, avoiding his gaze as she drops to her feet and skirts around him to leave the bathroom. "Thanks," She murmurs, her heart pounding in her chest. "I'm still mad at you though," Caroline adds, taking a seat on the corner of his bed now that they've moved from the bathroom to his bedroom.

"And I still have no idea why," Stefan muses. He leans against the doorframe, not sure if he should sit down with Caroline since she claims to be mad at him, but then again it _is _his bed and she doesn't really look mad. "Except that I somehow made you cut your foot…?"

"No, it's not that," Caroline corrects, "I already told you; I can't have sex because all the guys think I'm your girlfriend! I don't know where they'd get a crazy idea like that, but _I'm _going to go crazy if I don't get laid for the rest of the semester!"

Stefan's reaction is similar to Elena's, only when he starts to laugh Caroline throws a shoe at him and complains, "It's not funny! I'm serious, Stefan. Joey said so himself; none of the guys will touch me because they all think I'm with you. And what am I supposed to do about that? Drive out of town in search of horny men? What if there aren't any cute ones? What will I do then? Resort to masturbating with a vibrator? Fake dicks don't do it for me, Stefan; I need a real one!" She realizes then that she is sharing way too much information with her best guy friend, but she doesn't really care. In her mind, he brought this upon himself by creating a problem for her in the first place. None of her friends think she and Stefan are dating. It's only the guys who happen to have their facts messed up. "You need to do something about this," Caroline orders, and then adds bossily, "But first put some clothes on. Your towel is like barely hanging on there, and I really do not need to see…"

She trails off when she sees Stefan is smirking mischievously. It's not a look he normally wears, so she does notice right away. "Why do I need to put clothes on?" Stefan asks teasingly, "Is it bothering you that I'm practically naked? Hm? Adding to your sexual frustration because you –"

Caroline glares at him before reaching down for the other shoe whose match she already tossed at Stefan and trying to throw this one at his head as well. He steps forward and catches her wrist before she can get any momentum, and the shoe drops to the floor with a thump. Stefan stares down at her, a slight smile on his lips, and Caroline glares back at him for guessing correctly that looking at his body is making her even more sexually frustrated.

Still, she denies, "I am _not _sexually frustrated!" At Stefan's skeptical look, she corrects, "OK, fine, maybe I am! But what about you? Huh? When was the last time you had sex?" She can't think of the last time Stefan was talking to a girl or about a girl or anything to do with a girl. Unless he's got a secret lover, he's not getting any more action than she is, and judging by his contemplative expression and no reply, she's right. "That's what I thought," She concludes smugly, "You're not getting laid either."

Stefan slumps down beside her on his bed, staring past her head at the wall while he thinks it over. He's been so distracted with his psych class lately that nothing else has really been on his mind. Silas assigned them a project that won't be due until the week of their final exam, and Monday he has to present his idea for the social experiment he'll be doing, but he's having a tough time settling on an idea. Has he really been so caught up in his psych class that he didn't realize he and Caroline are in the exact same boat?

Stefan's green eyes shift back to Caroline and he concludes, "You're one-hundred percent right. People must think we're dating."

"People _do _think we're dating," Caroline corrects smartly.

The wheels in his brain start turning and soon he's forming an idea, and it's a pretty _perfect _idea, one that Silas is going to find brilliant for his psych project….but Caroline might not feel the same way. Stefan is confident he can convince her otherwise, though. She's his best friend, after all, and she's the one who always says best friends help each other out, no matter what. He could really use her help for this.

"Okay," Stefan says slowly, "Well, we can fix this."

"We can?" Caroline asks hopefully.

Stefan nods, "Yeah. Meet me here tomorrow night."

"Are you kicking me out?" Caroline raises an eyebrow.

"I have to finish something for Psych," Stefan explains apologetically.

"Yeah right," Caroline jokes as she tears herself from Stefan's comfy mattress, "You just want me to leave so you can rub one out since we've been talking about how little sex we've been getting."

Stefan's eyes widen in surprise and he chuckles at Caroline's accusation, "You caught me; that's exactly what I was planning to do."

Caroline smiles smugly before leaning in to give him a hug goodbye. She doesn't want to leave, but it's already 1AM, and Caroline knows how much work Stefan's been doing for Psych so she's not going to stick around just to hear more about nutty Professor Silas. What she planned to be only a quick hug turns into a lingering one when she feels Stefan's arms slide around her and pull her close. She's always been a big fan of Stefan's hugs; they're strong and warm and reassuring. This time is no different, only she's not used to being so close to him in so little clothing, and the contact of his skin on hers is having a strange effect. She expects him to have pulled away by now, only he hasn't, and she's not about to rip herself out of his arms. She buries her face in the crook of his neck, breathing in his woodsy-scented body wash and sighing because he smells so fucking good. She giggles out loud as she tells him exactly that, before attempting to wiggle out of his hold. He's not letting go.

Caroline twists her neck to look up at him, wondering what he's doing, and she opens her mouth to ask but his expression stops her. He is staring at her so seriously, his eyes filled with an emotion she doesn't quite understand at first glance, and she holds her breath in anticipation. Stefan half-smiles as he reaches up to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear, and Caroline finally recognizes the look in his eyes as _**lust **_at the exact moment his lips fall on hers. Caroline isn't even sure which one of them initiated the kiss, but neither of them are putting a stop to it. In fact, Stefan hugs her even tighter to his bare chest as he deepens the kiss, and Caroline cups his face in her hands as she sucks his bottom lip into her mouth. When Stefan leans back, Caroline moves with him, and soon she's straddling him as he lays flat on his back. Caroline doubts herself for a moment, but then Stefan dips his tongue into her mouth and her eyes flutter shut as she loses herself in the kiss.

This wasn't what Stefan had in mind when he got the idea for his psych project. Actually, this whole making out with Caroline thing is the opposite of what he originally intended to happen. He was going to suggest Caroline help him conduct an experiment on how many people will still attempt to seduce a person who is openly in a relationship; since everyone apparently thinks the two of them are together it'd be pretty easy for both of them to do, but now that he's crossed a serious line in their friendship he's not so sure. It would've been a great idea. Silas would have loved it. There were many different factors to discuss, like why someone would go after someone unavailable, why they wouldn't, would it be more girls, or would it be more guys, etc. The list goes on and on, and that was only from a sixty second brainstorm that Stefan did in his head moments ago. Now he can't do that. He can't ask that of Caroline when he just took advantage of her vulnerable state…

_I'm not taking advantage of her, _Stefan argues with himself. He didn't force her to kiss him. She kissed him back. She wants this to happen too, otherwise it wouldn't be happening. Caroline Forbes doesn't let herself get taken advantage of. She's the one who came to his apartment in the middle of the night, complaining about how sex-deprived she is, and practically begging him to do something about it. Stefan wants to slap himself, because she's the one who's drunk, not him, and he should be able to control himself. He normally does. It isn't like he's never noticed how beautiful and sexy Caroline can be, but they're friends so he never explored the idea of sleeping with her before. Something is different tonight. Something pulled him to her like a magnet, and he could fight it if he really wanted, but suddenly it gives him a whole different idea for his psych project.

Stefan flips Caroline onto her back and hovers over her, trailing kisses up her neck until he reaches her lips once more. Caroline moans into his mouth as his fingers skim across her breasts on their way down to her hips. She gasps out, "Stefan," but she doesn't tell him to stop. Hearing his name fall from her lips in such an erotic fashion makes him hard faster than he thought possible. He tells himself it's because he hasn't had sex since before Christmas break, but it is possible that he's always wanted Caroline this way and never knew it.

Caroline feels Stefan's arousal against her thigh and she realizes that there is a very huge possibility she's going to have sex with her best friend in a minute. She pulls her swollen lips away from his for long enough to ask, "Are you sure about all this?" She feels a wave of doubt wash over her and she closes her eyes as she waits for Stefan to tell her 'no', that they should probably stop before they do something they're going to seriously regret.

Stefan presses his lips to her forehead before replying, "I'm more than sure."

Caroline opens her eyes and smiles. That was not the answer she was expecting to hear, but it is the one she wanted to hear. Her dress comes off after that, followed by her undergarments, and when she's completely naked underneath him, she rips Stefan's towel off. Stefan doesn't rush her; he takes his time appreciating each and every part of her that he's never seen before. Caroline does the same with him, touching and kissing and sucking on every part of his body that she couldn't before. It isn't awkward or embarrassing in the slightest, even when they both have a good laugh over the fact that Stefan can't find a condom anywhere. He eventually finds one, and Caroline grabs it from him, pushing him back down on the bed and tearing the wrapper off the condom simultaneously. She rolls it onto his penis while she gazes into his eyes and he slides into her without breaking eye contact. When he's inside her completely, she realizes there's no going back, and for a moment she's scared they just ruined their friendship, but Stefan kisses her fears away. Almost like he can sense her doubt, he reassures her with his actions that everything is going to be all right.

Part of Caroline Forbes falls in love with Stefan Salvatore this night, and it is a bigger part than she is willing to admit to even herself. Maybe she always loved him. Maybe it was only a matter of time before this happened, and tonight was the lucky night. Caroline doesn't know. All she knows is that this is the best fucking sex she's had _ever_, and she never wants it to end. In fact, if Stefan proposed doing it again, she'd probably do it again and again and again. And, unbeknownst to her, that is exactly what Stefan plans to do.

* * *

**Please Review! I'd love to have your feedback. What did you think of Caroline and Stefan's first time? What do you think Stefan was thinking? Are there going to be regrets? (Besides the ones we already know about haha) What do you think about Caroline in Las Vegas with Damon? I'd love your comments/suggestions :)**

**Update will be soon, I promise! (:**


	4. Chapter 4 What Is Love

**Hey guys, is this update quick enough? ;)**

**So quite a few of you commented last chapter that you think Stefan is an asshole/scumbag/loser to take advantage of Caroline the way that he did, but let's keep in mind that he is a guy, and guys do have different opinions of sex than girls do. Plus, this chapter helps to get inside his head more, so I hope you guys can be hating on Stef a little _less _after this. But let me know what you're thinking. I love to hear from you guys :)**

**Thanks for reading, favoriting, and following! Big, huge thank-you to those of you who reviewed last chapter! Your feedback means so much to me, and I truly think all of you are amazing! :)**

**WARNING: This chapter contains a LEMON and there will be periodic lemons through-out the story from here to the end, so be aware;)**

* * *

**You're Gonna Miss Me**

**4.**** What is Love?**

**.**

_Damon De Luca is a sex god_. Caroline came to this conclusion after her fourth orgasm in under an hour. They started at the door when they first walked in, which is where Damon unzipped her little black dress and stripped her slowly to nothing but her black lace lingerie set. She undressed him quickly, and her eagerness seemed to please him. He got down on his knees and gave her orgasm numero uno right there against the wall just inside Caroline's room, with only his amazing tongue and two very skillful fingers. Then, he picked her up and carried her to the bed, where she returned the oral favor, before being flipped onto her belly and receiving her second orgasm of the hour by way of super hot sex, doggy style. After that, Caroline kind of lost track of the many positions Damon twisted his and her body into, most she'd never heard of let alone tried before. She had no idea she was still so flexible, not since she stopped cheerleading after high school, but _damn _- she's still got it! Orgasm three made her scream; one of those actual body-trembling, sheet-clenching, toe-curling orgasms that left her breathless.

"Come on," Damon murmured huskily against her neck, causing a shiver to run through her like an after-shock of the earthquake-orgasm that just destroyed her, "It's almost time." He scooped her exhausted body up, wrapped the sheet around both their naked bodies, and carried her out to the balcony, where he sat her in his lap and announced, "There's nothing better than watching the sun rise in Sin City."

Caroline looked at him curiously and raised an eyebrow, asking him skeptically, "Really?" He didn't seem like the romantic type to her…

"You didn't let me finish," Damon said with a smirk, "I was going to add, 'with your cock buried eight inches inside a gorgeous woman'."

Caroline didn't know why him talking dirty in her ear made her wet between her legs, when she was still tingly from their last session, and she wasn't used being spoken to like that during sex. It did though; it turned her on all over again. "I don't know if I can," Caroline said, not really meaning it. She would definitely need sleep afterwards, but she was going to let him rock her world one more time before denying him entrance. After all, who could refuse a line like that?

Damon snaked his hand between her thighs and felt the wetness between her folds, to which he happily pointed out, "You want to though."

Caroline nodded, not even ashamed of herself. She still doesn't know where he got that last condom from, but he slipped it on and entered her slowly. He must have known she'd be sore later, so he was considerably more gentle than before, but at some point during the sun rising and Damon caressing her tits softly she was reminded of Stefan. She hadn't thought about him at all this whole time, but this was too..._romantic_, too reminiscent of time spent with Stefan. So, Caroline lifted her hips and slammed down harder onto the man below her. She begged him, "Fuck me, Damon. _Harder._" She couldn't believe she said that, but he complied, and she didn't regret it because then all that was on her mind was Damon, _Damon, Damon. _

"Oh...shit...yes," Caroline moaned as she came for the fourth time, her entire body shuddering and shaking before collapsing on top of the bed, where Damon had moved them to finish. She smiled into the pillow, thinking to herself, _Damon De Luca is a sex god._

Damon disposed of the condom, and Caroline cleaned herself up with a tissue. She was physically incapable of getting dressed and frankly didn't care, so she slid between the sheets of the bed naked and tried to stay awake long enough to figure out if Damon was going to be staying or leaving. She'd never done this before, not that he knew that, and she was pretty sure she'd be upset if he got dressed and walked out right after screwing her brains out. But she wondered if it would be weird to have him sleep with her, because what would happen when they woke up? During Caroline's inner debate, Damon returned from the bathroom and climbed back into the bed with her. He kissed her once and then promptly passed out. Caroline was too tired to argue with herself any further, and so she gave into her exhaustion and was soon out like a light.

**.**

**January 2012**

**.**

Stefan awakens first, the morning after his late-night hook-up with his best friend, and even before opening his eyes he's beating himself up over his hasty decision and his inability to show self-control. What was he thinking? Well, he knows that he was thinking Caroline's pretty mouth was spilling way too much about her current state of arousal, and that she looked even sexier than usual. He knows that when she hugged him, the minute her skin touched his, he didn't want to let her go, but how did it turn from an innocent hug to a full-blown make-out session and more? He can't think about the _more _right now, because Caroline's naked body is already curled up at his side, and any more encouragement is only going to lead to a very uncomfortable stiff one for him.

Finally prying his eyes open, Stefan glances down at Caroline's blonde head, which is nestled up to his bicep, her left arm snaked around his and her left leg draped over his thighs. She looks so innocent, so beautiful, and Stefan doesn't want to disturb her, but he is freaking out and he can't lie in bed with her like this when he doesn't even know what the fuck he's doing. Slowly, carefully, Stefan untangles himself from Caroline and slides out of bed. Before exiting his bedroom, he readjusts the blankets over Caroline's body so that she remains comfortable and warm. He doubts she'll be waking up any time soon; it's only 6AM, and she sleeps like the dead after a night of drinking.

Out in the living room, Stefan paces the floor quietly while he tries to think up a solution to the problem he created. _What was I thinking? _Stefan frowns as he repeats the question in his head, _What was I thinking? _He slept with his best girl friend, his _best _friend. Seven years of friendship, of a strictly platonic relationship with the beautiful blonde Caroline Forbes and he chose last night to royally screw it up by having zero self-control. What is worse is that he thought he could somehow turn this into a positive thing by incorporating an idea for his Psych project, but now he doesn't have a clue what that theory is. 'How to trick your best friend into having sex with you'? 'How to ruin a seven-year friendship in one night'? _Stupid, stupid, Stefan. You're a stupid, moronic, idiot…_Stefan sighs as he shakes his head, wishing he could take back last night, only because he's scared of what will become of him and Caroline when she wakes up. What if everything is different now and they can never get back what they had?

When the digital clock on the stove reads 6:42, Stefan decides he needs to go straight to the Man himself, and by 'the Man', he means Silas. He's only been in Silas' Psych class for a little over three-weeks now, but he already feels like he's learned more in this one class about psychology than he has in his four-years of college, and he's a psych major! Silas is cut from a different thread than all the other teachers; he teaches in theories and experiments and wants his class to come to their own conclusions, to see first-hand that their theory was proven or disproven. Stefan wants to be like Silas, but he's still only a novice at this intense, hands-on psychology stuff, and he needs a push in the right direction. Office hours don't start for another hour and fifteen minutes, but he can't wait until then. Stefan needs Silas _now_, and he hopes his professor will understand why once he explains it to him.

Silently, Stefan slips back into his bedroom to change into a pair of Dickies and a plain gray t-shirt. He looks at Caroline once more and is surprised by the overwhelming urge to crawl back into the bed with her and figure out their feelings about this on their own, but he resists. He is too nervous what she might say, how she might react, that maybe she'll push him away for this, so he leaves in hopes of finding some insight from the man who put this idea in his head in the first place.

Almost like fate is on his side this morning, Stefan runs into Silas as he's crossing the quad, the older man carrying a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and his brown leather briefcase in the other. Stefan waves and hurries to catch up, getting right to the point and asking Silas if he can talk to him about their social experiment project. Silas sees that Stefan looks desperate, and a little bit panicked, so his curiosity is piqued. He invites Stefan to follow him to his office, where he sips from his coffee while Stefan explains what happened with Caroline last night, sparing no details despite the man is technically his college professor. Silas listens with great interest, his thoughts never straying away from the topic at hand, and he thinks that he sees some of the qualities of his self in Stefan and he'd like to help the young man out.

Upon concluding his story, Stefan looks to Silas for a response and the professor steeples the tips of his fingers together on top of his desk before stating, "I'm not seeing a problem here, Stefan. Looks like the perfect opportunity to test the theories on love and friendship. Have you ever heard of _The Colors of Love_ – John Lee? I've got a copy of it around here somewhere." He stands up and scans his bookcase for the one he's thinking of, and when he finds it he pulls it out and hands it over to Stefan. "The relationship you've described is a classic 'storge', a love formed by companionship and friendship and not physicality. But when you add intimacy, physical longing, and passion to that, you're bringing in the 'eros' element. The two generally form an 'agape love', which many consider to be the purest form of love; it combines the companionship and shared values of 'storge love' with the intimacy and tremendous passion that an 'eros love' has, creating a completely unselfish form of love. That is what everyone wants, isn't it?"

Stefan lets Silas' words soak in before making any attempt to reply. Silas had mentioned these theories of love before, of six separate loves that humans feel for one another, but their class hadn't yet gone too in depth with it. He'd heard John Lee's name, and his ideas, but he isn't as familiar as Silas obviously is. He finds himself frowning as he asks his professor, "So…you think that's what Caroline and I have? An agape love?"

Silas chuckles, "That would be the question, but I haven't a clue, Stefan. Only you and _Caroline _know how you feel, but the potential is there. Your project is on creating a theory and setting out to prove or disprove that theory. Either your theory is that the storge and eros will form into agape love, or that it won't, and then you need to explain why you think you'll reach those results. At the end of the semester, right before finals, you'll have to come to a conclusion and that's what you'll write your paper about." Silas tips his head to the side and observes that Stefan seems to be coming around to the idea, but there is still a hint of hesitancy in his eyes. He points out, "You have the weekend to think about it, Stefan. Theories are due on Monday. But right now, you have a girl in your bed that you should probably get back to, because no matter what you decide to do, the conversation between you and Caroline can only be pushed off for so long. And from experience I can tell you that most girls don't like waking up alone, especially not after turning to their best friend for sex. It might give her the wrong idea…"

Before the words are out of his mouth, Stefan is standing up and announcing, "You're right, Silas. Thanks. I gotta go. I'll see you on Monday."

Silas smiles at his student, already anxious for Monday to see what decision Stefan will come to, and he offers, "Any time. Good luck."

Stefan leaves the building that houses all of the professors' private offices and practically jogs back to his apartment complex. His mind is swirling with Silas' words of advice and the color wheel theory of love that John Lee came up with back in 1976. He doesn't know if he and Caroline have what John Lee described as the purest and most longed for kind of love there is, but he thinks he owes it to their seven-year friendship to find out. He's not going to let everything be ruined by telling her it was all a mistake, not when last night he told her he was more than sure about it. He is willing to give it a chance to make it work with Caroline, not only to prove Silas' theory correct, but because he doesn't want to lose her. He doesn't know what he'd do without Caroline in his life, and that has to mean something. _Right? _He hopes it means something to her too…

**.**

**May 2012**

**.**

Caroline is startled awake by the sound of the hotel phone ringing loudly in her ear from the nightstand. She sits straight up in the king size bed, the sheet slipping off her and exposing her bare skin to the cool air conditioned room, causing her to shiver. Her head is pounding lightly, and she's more than confused when she looks around the unfamiliar room. It hits her like a bucket of cold water though, and she realizes she's in a hotel in Las Vegas, and she had a wild night of drinking, gambling – and _winning_, don't forget – and hot, hot sex with a super hot stranger. Too bad said hot stranger is no longer around, and left no traces of himself whatsoever in his wake. As Caroline ponders over this, the obnoxious phone continues to ring, and Caroline finally decides to answer its call.

"Hello?" Caroline greets as she catches sight of the alarm clock beside the phone, which is shouting at her that she's been sleeping all day and it's already five o'clock in the evening. _Holy shit, _Caroline's eyes bug out of her head, _How did I sleep for so long? _Apparently sex with Damon De Luca is not only mind-blowing and life-changing, but completely energy-draining as well. _Must be, to knock me out for close to twelve hours!_

"Caroline, where the Hell are you?" The sound of her mother's voice on the other end of the line was _so _not what Caroline was expecting to be hearing, and she pulls the phone away from her ear to stare at it in shock, even as her Mom is continuing to scold her in a loud and disapproving tone. "Are you out of your mind? You left school three days before Graduation to go to Las Vegas? _**Las Vegas?! **_What were you thinking? Your father drove all the way up from _Atlanta! _I drove an hour and a half in the pouring rain to get here in time to see you walk the stage at your college graduation – _an education that your father and I paid for, mind you! _– and you're not even here!"

With a groan, Caroline interjects with an apology before Liz can continue on to say that she grilled Bonnie for answers and finally was given a hotel phone number, where she learned her daughter was renting a room in, and now Caroline will be a disappointment forever and ever until the end of time…"Mom, look, I'm sorry. I forgot to call you and tell you that I was leaving early. I should have called. I was planning on calling actually, but morning was gone before I knew it and I forgot about the time difference here. I'm sorry, Mom. I really am. Tell Dad I'm sorry too."

Liz sighs into the phone before admitting, "Bonnie told me what happened, honey. I'm disappointed in you for leaving the way you did, but I do understand. You and _Stefan_ –"

Again, Caroline has to interrupt, this time because she doesn't want to hear her mom's opinion of her stupid, fake relationship with Stefan. "_Mom!_" Caroline whines, "I can't believe Bonnie told you! That is none of your business. I don't want to talk about it!" She doesn't know why, but somehow every argument with her mom always causes her to resort to acting like a spoiled, bratty teenager, and this one is no different.

"Okay, all right," Liz says soothingly, "We don't have to talk about it, Caroline." After a brief moment of silence, Liz wonders, "Are you being safe? Do you need any money? When are you planning on coming home?"

Caroline chooses to only answer one of the questions directly, "I don't know when I'm coming home. I'm fine. Don't worry about me. I'm twenty-two. I can take care of myself."

"You're my only daughter, Caroline Marie," Liz reminds her sternly, "I'll worry about you until the day I die. I only want the best for you. I want you to be happy."

"Well," Caroline informs her in a snippy tone, "I'm _not _happy, Mom. That's why I'm here. I'm trying to be happy again, okay? And I'm not going to come home until I am." _Or at least until I've run out of ideas and resources to get happy…_

Liz tells Caroline she's okay with that, as long as she keeps in touch, and then she gently chides her for ditching her cell phone. "I hope you find happiness," Liz expresses genuinely, "You deserve all the happiness in the world. And come home. I love you."

"You too," Caroline returns, and then hangs up after promising to call her in a few days, or if she switches hotels or cities. She sighs loudly and flops back on her pillow, staring up at the ceiling but not really seeing it. She can't believe she forgot that Graduation was occurring at this very moment. Well, judging by the time, she'd say it's over now, and that's probably why her mom called her all in a tizzy the way that she did. She really should have sent her mom and dad a text letting them know she wouldn't be in attendance, but…it's too late now.

Graduation is officially over, which means she's an actual college graduate, and that makes her smile proudly. She earned her bachelor's degree in business and event planning, and can now get a job doing something that she loves. But she's not going to be looking any time soon. She can't be the best she can be when she's at her worst. Right now, she's broken, but she's going to pick up the pieces, put herself back together, and when she's got everything back in its proper place she'll be ready to start her life; _really _start her life.

Now that she's awake, Caroline feels how sore her body is from working it so hard with Damon; her legs are aching, her lady parts feel raw, and her nipples are sore. She's also kind of glad Damon didn't stick around to see what she looks like in the morning once she catches sight of herself in the mirror. Her post-sleep, sex hair is out of control and her make-up is so smudged she looks like a hung-over raccoon. It is not a pretty sight _at all_. She gets ready for a shower, but first she feels her stomach grumble almost painfully from hunger, and she decides to call down for some room service. She orders breakfast, not caring that it's actually dinner-time, and then hops in the shower.

By the time Caroline is done standing under the steaming hot streams of water and turns the shower off to get dry, she hears a knock on her door signifying the arrival of her food. For a moment, a pithy and silly moment, Caroline thinks maybe Damon came back, because she's feeling a little put-off by his exit, but it's not him. The young hotel worker looks surprised to see a pretty blonde answer the door wrapped in only a towel, and he stutters his thanks when she takes the tray of food and hands him a generous tip. She smiles at the kid before shutting the door and carrying her meal to the bed, where she climbs up and gets comfy.

While she eats, Caroline decides to give Bonnie a call. She wants to know what Bonnie told her mom specifically about her and Stefan, and she also wants to hear about how Graduation went. She forgot if Bonnie said she was going to a celebratory dinner with her parents tonight, or if she told them she was spending her last night partying on campus with her fellow graduates. Either way, Caroline punches her friend's number into the phone and waits as it rings in her ear.

Another surprise is thrown her way when it isn't Bonnie's voice that greets her, but _Elena's_. "Caroline!" Elena squeals happily into the phone, "Oh my God! Guys – it's Caroline! _Care…_" She sounds drunk, oh so very drunk at the moment, "I can't believe you missed it. We graduated!" She lets out a loud 'woo-hoo!' into the phone and Caroline winces away from it. "I miss you! You were supposed to be here; the three musketeers…we're missing our blond bombshell." Caroline can hear the pout in Elena's voice, and she feels a little left out because it should have been her there with Elena and Bonnie, getting shit-faced and celebrating their new lives. She's not there though, and part of her blames Elena for it, even though it isn't her fault. Elena is just Elena, and she can't be blamed for how Stefan feels. "But you're in _Las Vegas_! I almost forgot. Okay, okay, okay – tell me all about it. Where are you staying? What did you do so far? I wanna know _everything!_"

When Elena finally breaks for a breath and gives Caroline a moment to speak, the blonde awkwardly states, "Uh, hey Lena. Congrats. Sounds like you're having a good time. Can I – is…is Bonnie there?" She hopes Elena isn't mad that she's kind of blowing off her questions, but maybe she's already too drunk to notice. Otherwise, Caroline is going to have to explain that even though it isn't Elena's fault, she's kind of working through some things that she can't talk to Elena about. It's strange and Caroline does wish it didn't have to be that way, but all she can see when she hears Elena's voice is the way Stefan looks at her with that stupid expression, like she's a goddamn angel who fell from the sky and is perfect in every way. Elena _is _perfect, and Caroline isn't, and she always knew that Stefan secretly had feelings for Elena. _It's my own damn fault, _Caroline reminds herself, _I knew it wouldn't work out, but I was selfish, and now that it played out exactly as I knew it would…I'm bitter. _But is it so surprising that she thought she was deserving of a happy ending too?

Thankfully, Elena is too buzzed to realize her friend is avoiding talking to her, and she jabbers on happily, "Yeah. O' course! Bonnie, Bonnie, _Bonnie!_" Elena sings into the phone, "She's doing her hair in the bathroo-oom! Hold on, 'kay? Just – wait right here." Caroline frowns as it sounds like Elena's drops the phone on the floor, and then laughs when she hears Elena add in an exaggerated whisper, "Be right back! Don't go anywhere…"

Caroline shakes her head at Elena's odd behavior, because it really isn't like her to be so completely wasted. Especially since it's only like 9PM in Virginia and from what she's gathered they're still at the apartment getting ready to go out. Apparently Elena's in a celebratory mood tonight. Well, that's good for her. Caroline can be upset with her, but still be happy that Elena is having fun. She deserves to have fun, too. At least she wasn't yapping in her ear about how happy she and Stefan are together now that Caroline is out of the picture. _Are they truly happy now with me out of the picture? _Caroline feels a sharp pain in her heart at that thought.

On the other end, she hears the phone being picked up and shuffled around. She waits expectantly for Bonnie to speak, but nothing is said. Caroline swears she hears someone breathing though. Could it be Elena? "Bon?" Caroline asks, "You there?"

"Caroline…" Her heart dives into her stomach at the sound of _his _voice. He seems relieved, but Caroline feels like she's going to throw up. "Are you…can we talk for a minute?"

Caroline doesn't even consider his question before ripping the phone from her ear and slamming it down on the receiver. She breathes in shakily and covers her face with her hands as she tries to squeeze her eyes shut tight enough to seal the pain inside. She doesn't want to cry over Stefan anymore. She doesn't want his voice to be a constant pain in her heart. It shouldn't be like that, it was never like that before, but he ruined everything. He ruined _him _for her, and she loved him before, loved him so much. Even when he wasn't hers, she loved him, just for being who he was, but Silas changed him, and she doesn't know him anymore. She doesn't want to talk to him, because he's impossible to talk to. He thinks everything can be explained away by science and 'theories' and _bullshit_. It doesn't matter what he says, because she did love him, and it was real. He's the one who never truly meant what he said, what he did. He's the one who broke her heart because he 'thought he was doing the right thing'. She is so angry now that she doesn't even have the appetite to finish her pancakes and bacon. She pushes the plate away and curls up into a ball on the bed, staring at the TV screen even though it isn't on.

When the phone rings ten minutes later, Caroline picks it up right away. This time, Bonnie is on the other line, and she got rid of Stefan and Elena first. "I'm so sorry," She says after explaining they were all getting ready to go to a party at the Phi Beta Kappa house, "I didn't realize I left my phone out there. And normally Elena wouldn't answer it, you know that, but she's really wasted at the moment."

"I could tell," Caroline replies.

"She misses you," Bonnie adds, but then changes the subject, "Stefan should not have got on the phone though. I don't know what he was thinking. He told me you hung up on him…"

"Of course I did," Caroline says bluntly, "I don't want to talk to him. I have nothing to say to him, and I don't want to hear what he has to say to me. There's no point. We're done. Our so-called relationship, as well as our friendship, is over, so what's there to say?"

"I don't know, Care," Bonnie sighs, seeming like she's holding back from saying something, but Caroline doesn't prompt her to spill since it most likely is something she doesn't want to hear. Instead, Bonnie explains, "That's what I told him. I mean, I said you aren't ready to talk to him, and he needs to give you time, but he –" She bites her tongue.

Curious now, Caroline begrudgingly asks, "He what, Bon?"

"He seems really torn up about you being gone," Bonnie says gently, "I think he finally understands how messed up the whole thing was. He regrets it, Care; I can see it. And him and Elena –"

This is where Caroline has to cut in, "Nope. That's enough. I'm glad to hear he's feeling remorseful, but that's enough Stefan-talk for one day. Don't you want to hear all about my first night in Vegas? I thought for sure you'd be asking me twenty questions by now."

After slight hesitation, Bonnie agrees, "Of course I do. How was it?"

"It was ah-ma-zing!" Caroline sighs gleefully, "It was life-changing, _epic_ – I can finally use that word to describe a night in my life. Last night was epic." Caroline settles herself more comfortably on the hotel bed, and Bonnie does the same in her room in Virginia, as Caroline prepares to rehash last night's secrets. "It started out in the bar at my hotel, where a seriously gorgeous man bought me a drink, and then came over to introduce himself. His name is Damon De Luca, and he's six feet tall with black hair and seriously sexy blue eyes, like the bluest I've ever seen in my life. He and I talked for a bit, had another drink, and then he offered to take me on a tour of the Las Vegas strip. I, obviously, said _yes_, and he took me to some of the nicest casinos in Vegas; the MGM Grand, the Bellagio, and Caesars Palace. I won five-grand at the Bellagio after watching the fountain show outside, and then after Caesars Palace…we went back to my place." She doesn't let Bonnie comment before she's claiming, "I know, I know; I'm a giant whore, but I don't care! I had sex with a hot stranger last night, and I can honestly say that I don't regret it in the least. I had fun. And he was unbelievable in bed – _unbelievable, _Bonnie. You'd be blushing all the way down to your toes if I told you the things he and I did…"

Bonnie laughs and comments teasingly, "Maybe you shouldn't kiss and tell then. It sounds like you had a good time. I'm happy for you. And you won five-thousand dollars?! No way! That's insane. Are you going to see him again?"

"I know, talk about beginner's luck, right?" Caroline comments on her winnings, "I just kept winning and winning, and the numbers multiplied, and then when I realized I got the jackpot I was in complete and utter shock."

Bonnie points out that Caroline didn't answer her question, "And Damon?"

"What about him?" Caroline proceeds to tell her best friend in a disheartened tone, "He kept me awake all night to show me the sunrise, and then we went to bed, and when I woke up he was gone. We had a good time, but that's it. I guess that's how one-night-stands work…? I'm not going to go searching for him when he didn't leave me a number or anything. If he wanted to see me again, he'd have asked. I don't know…"

"I'm sorry, Care," Bonnie tells her genuinely, "That blows. Yeah, that's pretty much how a one-night-stand goes, but you were never really a one-night-stand kinda girl."

"I was never a 'fuck your best friend and then force him to go out with you when he doesn't even like you because you're too insecure to lose him' kinda girl either, but we both know how that story ends," Caroline says sardonically. She chews on her lip in thought before commenting, "Maybe I've been wrong this whole time. Maybe Stefan's right; maybe love never lasts, and true love doesn't exist, and being unemotionally attached is the only way to have a sexual relationship. I don't know. It sure seems that way to me. Us girls are wrong; getting attached, forcing guys into relationships and thinking we can change them and mold them into the perfect man for us, constantly trying to make things work that are _impossible _to fix. Who wants that? Why isn't it easier? Shouldn't loving someone be easy? It felt like the easiest thing in the world…but it wasn't real."

Bonnie wishes she could reach through the phone and scoop her bestie up in a tight hug, but since she can't, she does the next best thing – she tries to give her hope, "Maybe it _was_ real."

* * *

**Please Review! I want to hear from you! :) What did you think of this chapter? Likes/dislikes/hopes for future chapters, I want to hear all about them:)**

**NOTE: At the beginning of the story, I realized I accidently put Caroline's age as 23, when she's actually 22 right now. Later in the fic she turns 23. I fixed the age, but in case I missed it somewhere (please let me know if I did) or you were wondering why it changed; that's the reason :)**

**-MissCarolineForbes**


	5. Chapter 5 Not A One-Night-Stand Kinda

**Sorry guys, I meant to have this up for you last weekend, but I got a little stuck at the end. Hopefully you guys like:)**

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***A/N: Forgot to mention, (I did at the bottom of last chapter, but some of you may have missed the note) Caroline's age is 22 in this story, and she'll be turning 23. Earlier in the story I accidentally wrote 23, and I went back and corrected it, so I wanted to make a short announcement so that everyone is on the same page. K, that's all:)**

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**You're Gonna Miss Me **

**5. ****Not A One-Night-Stand Kinda Girl**

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After hanging up with Bonnie, Caroline decides she's not going to sit around and sulk all night, not when she's staying smack-dab in the middle of a city that has virtually anything she could think of to do. Also, she won five-thousand dollars last night, so she really can do anything she wants to, and that brings an almost devilish grin to her lips. She slides into her favorite pair of Lucky Brand Jeans and a pink and blue flowered blouse from Forever 21, checks that her purse is housing all the essentials, and then heads down to the hotel lobby. Once at the front desk, Caroline asks the man behind the counter if there is a mall nearby, and he refers her to the wall of brochures to his left. She rolls her eyes at his inability to simply answer her question, but gives the brochure wall a once-over, and finds one about the Fashion Show Mall of Las Vegas pretty easily. The picture on the front is of the outside of the mall, which is humongous and has what looks like a giant satellite perched at the top of a tower on the top floor of the building, and Caroline cocks her head to the side in hopes it will make more sense from that angle. It doesn't, but despite being unable to figure out the structural reasoning behind the building Caroline is still eager to go. It is a mall after all, and Caroline Forbes _loves_ to shop.

Caroline informs the front desk before leaving that she will be staying for at least another night, and she pays up-front so that she doesn't have to worry about it later. Then, she makes her way to the parking lot, where she unlocks her car with the button on her keychain before hopping in and turning on the engine. When she pulls out of the lot, she takes a right, merging with the heavy traffic coming down the Strip, and she follows the signs for Fashion Show Mall. It isn't hard to find, and it is even bigger than the picture on the brochure boasted it to be, making Caroline wonder if she should have postponed this shopping spree until tomorrow since she's only given herself just over two hours to shop. How can a mall located one block north of Caesars Palace and just across the street from Wynn Las Vegas still close at 9PM? It seems awful early for a city where most people aren't ready to go out until that time.

Well, since she's already here, Caroline decides to make the most of it. She pulls into the first available parking spot in the parking garage, and commits the floor level and row number to memory as she finds the elevator. There's no way she wants to get lost in this parking garage after closing time. She should never have watched that P2 movie about the girl being trapped in the parking garage and stalked by that crazy security guy…Caroline looks around nervously as she presses the button for the elevator, sighing in relief when the doors open and a couple with their two children emerge, chatting in excitement about their purchases from the Disney Store. Caroline steps inside the elevator and presses the button for the ground floor, feeling excited herself at the prospect of new clothes and shoes. The elevator dings before the doors slide open, and Caroline sucks in a deep breath as she walks off the elevator and into a shopaholic's dream-come-true.

"Oh…my…God," Caroline murmurs under her breath as she looks around the massive, three-story, two-hundred and fifty store mall. The mall back home in Virginia that she normally goes to doesn't even have half as many stores, and it definitely isn't as cool as this contemporary-yet-classic mall masterpiece. She wishes she could take it back home to Virginia with her. The citizens of Las Vegas don't need this gem; they've already got the entire Strip to entertain them. Isn't that enough?

Without wasting another moment drooling over the paradise she just stepped into, Caroline takes off in the direction of BCBGMAXAZRIA, which she's only ever shopped online from. Caroline has to consciously keep herself from squealing like a happy little pig at the sight of so many trendy clothes, gorgeous dresses, amazing accessories, and shoes to die for. She leaves the first store with two big bags and an hour and fifteen minutes to spare for shopping elsewhere. She budgets her time well, and manages to check out and purchase items from Frederick's of Hollywood – a sexy lingerie store, Diesel – where the coolest jeans and denim clothes can be found, Cache – a sophisticated and sassy dress boutique, and kate spade new york – home to the cutest designer handbags and New York inspired clothing and accessories. In all honesty, Caroline could have shopped all day and night and still been unsatisfied, but she considers this a successful shopping trip. She did blow through nearly half of last night's winnings and has a staggering amount of bags in her arms that she wasn't sure would all fit on the elevator, but did, so it was a good night. If Caroline ever wins big at the casino again, she is coming back here for more retail therapy, without a doubt.

Back at her hotel, Caroline pulls out each of her new items one by one and lays them on the bed. She then puts some music on with the clock-radio on the night stand and tries on everything she bought, checking herself out thoroughly in the big mirror on the wall to ensure her purchases were all fine decisions. She is not disappointed with anything, so she neatly folds them away in the drawers of the hotel dresser and hangs some up in the closet for safe-keeping. After that, she rings down for more room service, this time dessert, and buys two romantic comedies On Demand; LOL, starring Miley Cyrus and Demi Moore, and the Five-Year Engagement, with Jason Segel and Emily Blunt. She thought the first would be so bad she could simply laugh at Miley the entire time, but ended up becoming emotionally invested in the film and wanting her character to find happiness; how fucking crazy is that?! The second, since it stars Jason Segel, was supposed to make her _laugh_, and it did in a few parts, but it also made her cry and crying wasn't part of the deal for tonight. It was long and kind of slow, enough to nearly put her to sleep, but it had a good ending, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.

While the credits are rolling, Caroline flops over on her side and stretches out across the bed. Her fingers skim the top of the headboard and slip underneath the pillow on the right side of the bed that she didn't use last night. It was the side of the bed that Damon was sleeping on, and as her fingers brush against something small with pointed edges, she sits up to investigate. There, underneath the pillow, is a black rectangular business card with the words Mandalay Bay Resort & Casino written in bold, teal-blue letters. Caroline gasps out loud.

_Holy shit_…Caroline thinks to herself, _Did Damon leave this for me so that I could find and see him again? _She smiles as she places the card on the nightstand, her mind already mapping out her plan for tomorrow…She wasn't going to be just a one-night-stand after all.

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**January 2012 **

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When Caroline wakes up in Stefan's bed, naked and alone, she connects the dots pretty quickly and realizes she majorly fucked up. She slept with her _best friend_, and if him not being here is any indication of how he must be feeling right now, it was a big mistake. How could she be so stupid? What was she thinking showing up so late last night, fully intoxicated from a frat party, and horny as hell since she was just rejected? It wasn't like she was subtle either; she clearly recalls telling Stefan how badly she wanted a dick, a real live dick and not a cheap imitation rubber dick either. _Oh my God_. Caroline hides her face behind her hands and groans. _I basically begged him to fuck me. I am a dumb friggin' whore!_

Caroline listens intently for any noises coming from outside Stefan's bedroom, but she hears nothing. Once she knows the coast is clear, she reaches to the floor to retrieve her bra and panties, and quickly puts them on. She re-dresses in her outfit from last night, feeling even cheaper by the second, and then locates her cell phone. Checking the time, she sees that it is just 8AM, way too early to be awake after a night of drinking, but Caroline feels the walls closing in around her and she needs to get out. She pushes her feet into her heels as she scrolls through her phone and selects a number. While it rings in her ear, she opens Stefan's bedroom door and checks the living room and kitchen to be sure he isn't home.

"Hello?" The groggy, sleep-filled voice on the other end of the line finally picks up on the seventh ring.

"Bonnie!" Caroline hisses into the phone in an urgent, half-whisper, "Oh my God, you have no idea what I did last night. I screwed up so bad – so, so bad! I don't know what to do, you have to help me."

"What…?" Bonnie pries her tired eyes open and glances at the clock as she stretches across her bed. "It's so early, Care. What kind of trouble did you get into that has to be fixed before noon?"

Cutting right to the chase, Caroline confesses, "Stefan and I hooked up last night."

Bonnie's jaw drops and she is immediately sitting straight up in bed and feeling much more awake than she did two seconds ago. "_What_?" She asks in disbelief.

"I know!" Caroline moans, "What do I do? I woke up and he's not here. What does that mean? He totally wishes it never happened, right? Ugh – why am I so stupid? I want to cry, Bon; you don't even know. I feel like I already lost him. What am I supposed to do without Stefan? And like, I don't even know if I'm supposed to be waiting here for him so that we can talk or if I just leave while he's gone and pretend nothing ever happened. What do I do?"

"Okay," Bonnie says slowly, still trying to wrap her head around the idea of Stefan and Caroline having sex, "Okay…this is not that bad. It's not the end of the world. I mean, it's pretty…okay – I have no idea, Care. How did this even happen?"

"I don't even know," Caroline admits, throwing her free hand up in the air even though Bonnie can't see her action through the phone. She sighs sorrowfully, "I was drunk and I was mad because Joey thought I was Stefan's girlfriend, so I marched over here like a fucking idiot to tell Stefan it was all his fault, and I made a complete fool of myself. I'm pretty sure I talked for like fifteen minutes about how horny I was, and he was standing there all wet and in his towel and…and he-he never looked so hot to me before! I swear, I simply lost my mind." After a brief, contemplative pause, Caroline continues, "But he obviously lost his too, because I'm pretty sure he kissed me first. And it's not like I took my own clothes off and forced myself on him; he wanted it to happen." _He said he was more than sure he wanted it to happen, so why the hell isn't he here? _"I guess he changed his mind. I have to get out of here."

"Maybe you should wait for him and talk," Bonnie suggests, "It's only going to be more awkward if you leave now with no explanation, no questions answered."

"If he wanted to talk, he'd be here," Caroline points out as she gathers the items that spilled from her purse last night and zips it closed. She shrugs the strap over her shoulder and makes her way to the door, trying not to cry because it's her own fault she's in this situation and crying isn't going to change anything. She opens the front door and steps back in shock when she sees someone standing just outside. She gasps, "Stefan!"

"Stefan?" Bonnie repeats in her ear from the phone, her voice sounding shocked and intrigued at the same time.

Stefan smiles at Caroline as he steps inside his apartment. He offers her the lidded coffee cup from his left hand and a short explanation, "French vanilla; extra cream and sugar, like you always get it."

Caroline takes the cup from his hand, her expression likely dazed and confused. Bonnie, who is still on the phone, whispers, "Aw, he brought you coffee? That's actually really sweet. Doesn't sound like he –"

"Uh…" Caroline thinks quickly and blurts out, "_Mom_, let me call you back." Then she hangs up and shoves her phone inside her purse and says to Stefan, "Thanks." She attempts to smile, but her lips aren't being cooperative.

"Are you leaving?" Stefan asks, taking note of her appearance and her handbag. He motions to the brown paper bag in his other hand, announcing, "I bought a few bagels too…if you want to eat."

"Oh," Caroline can't seem to hide her surprise, "Sure." She really thought Stefan left and wasn't coming back until she was gone. The fact that he came back with coffee and breakfast, and has a smile on his face, makes Caroline wonder if he didn't actually regret what happened last night. If he doesn't regret it though, then what does that mean for them? Do they continue on being friends and try and forget that they slept together, even if it was really, really good? Do they keep doing it, since it was so good and they are such good friends, and pretend it isn't going to ruin their friendship becoming fuck buddies? She hasn't got a clue, but she does sit down on the couch and reach out to Stefan for a bagel.

Stefan, who has basically been holding his breath since he walked in – thinking that Caroline was going to walk out on him or yell at him or throw things at his head – sinks down next to her on the couch and hands her bagel over. He's glad he thought to bring her breakfast; otherwise he'd have no excuse for being out of his apartment and not in bed with her where he belonged. He thinks the fact that he hasn't had a shoe thrown at him is a good sign that he can still fix things with Caroline. He just has to know how she's feeling…

"So, I was thinking, and we should probably talk," Stefan says after unwrapping his bagel.

Caroline freezes; bagel in hand, one bite taken out of the side, a little cream cheese on the corner of her lip. She was so not expecting him to say that. That is a distinctly Caroline thing to say. In fact, that is a distinctly _female_ thing to say, and she can't believe Stefan actually wants to talk. She has to admit, hearing him say that does relieve her some of the tension she's been holding in since she woke up. Him realizing they need to talk is a good thing; it means he knows that what happened last night can't just be ignored.

"Yeah," Caroline nods, licking the cream cheese off her lips, "We probably should." _But I'm not going first, so you better get to talking, Mr. Salvatore… _

Stefan nods, and then waits for Caroline to say something, _anything_, but her lips are sealed. _This is awkward_, Stefan realizes. Caroline is never speechless, and he doesn't believe for a second that she has nothing to say, so he really doesn't understand why she's not pouring her heart out right now. What can he do to get her to talk? If he shares how he's feeling first, the whole social experiment will be thrown off because what she says will be completely based off _his_ thoughts and feelings of last night. If he wants to remain subjective for the project, Caroline has to reach her own conclusions of what last night means for their relationship. _This is going to be harder than I thought. _

Suddenly, Caroline stands up, shaking her head back and forth rapidly and stating, "I can't do this." She puts her bagel on the coffee table next to her French vanilla coffee and picks up her purse instead. "I just _can't_. I mean, this is so awkward. I've never felt like this around you, and now everything is fucking messed up. Is this how it's going to be now? We're going to be awkward and-and not talk and shit? I'd rather pretend nothing happened at all than do _this!" _

"Caroline," Stefan stands too, "Please don't leave. I don't want things to be awkward between us. I don't want everything to be messed up. I don't think I can pretend last night didn't happen though."

"Really?" Caroline asks, feeling hopeful. "Me either, but I thought I'd…I don't know…_try_, I guess." She studies Stefan's features; his strong jaw, perfect lips, his deep green eyes, and even though he looks the same as he always did he is somehow different to her now. Or maybe _she's _the different one. "I don't know what to do, Stefan. I just – I never thought _this _would happen."

"Sure you did," Stefan jokes, and Caroline raises an eyebrow at him in surprise. "Don't you remember when I first moved to Mystic Falls?" Caroline's eyes widen and her cheeks turn a tinge pinker in embarrassment. Stefan chuckles as he recalls, "I believe you were already planning our June Wedding before the first week of school was up. Does that sound right to you?"

Caroline squeezes her eyes shut as she giggles, remembering exactly how infatuated by Stefan she was when he first moved to her small Virginia town the beginning of their sophomore year of high school. He was the cutest guy at Mystic Falls High, and he was also smart and athletic; he was everything Caroline wanted in a guy and more. Stefan wasn't looking for a girlfriend though – he'd just lost his mother to cancer less than three months before and he wasn't ready – so Caroline settled for being his friend. Once they established their close relationship as friends, it was no longer an issue to Caroline how handsome he was, or how perfect for her he would be; friends don't date, and she felt silly for even thinking she and Stefan would have made a good couple.

"Yeah," Caroline agrees with a smile, "That sounds about right." The smile slides off her face when she realizes they're no closer to figuring out how to fix things between them, despite carrying on a normal conversation with each other. "But that was a long time ago, and you even said once that it would never work between us, that we're better as friends. You said there would never be a 'you and me'. I know that last night didn't change that. You don't like me in that way, Stef, and that's okay because I've known that for years. Just because some idiots at this school seem to think we're a couple doesn't mean I've become one of them. We're not together. And last night was…last night was a –"

"Don't even say it was a mistake, Caroline," Stefan interjects, his warning tone sounding more pleading to his ears than anything. He wasn't sure what to expect when he said he and Caroline should talk, but he definitely wasn't expecting Caroline to say what happened was a mistake and they should forget all about it. How can she ask him to forget it? How can she say it was a mistake?

"Why not?" Caroline asks, her voice verging on hysterical. "Isn't that what it was? It was a big, fat, colossal mistake that we can never take back, and it's going to ruin us, Stefan."

"It doesn't have to," Stefan says slowly, while his mind is working on over-drive trying to come up with a solution to this problem, "We won't let it. It wasn't a mistake. It doesn't have to change anything."

"Don't you understand?" Caroline sighs sadly, "It already has." She feels her throat closing up as her eyes fill with tears and she turns away so Stefan doesn't see her cry.

Stefan doesn't let her hide from him though, and he feels even guiltier when he sees that he's made his best friend cry. It pains him to see her crying; he never wanted Caroline to get hurt. He reaches forward and pulls Caroline closer to him, telling her gently, "No, I don't understand, because I'm not going to let anything change between us. I'm not going to lose you, Caroline. You're my best friend; I don't just like you, I love you. I would do anything for you. Last night might have been unexpected and surprising, it might have complicated things, but it was not a mistake. I don't regret it, do you?"

Caroline blinks away her tears as she stares up at Stefan in disbelief. She can feel her heart thumping hard against her ribcage, and it pounds even harder when Stefan wipes away all traces of tears from her cheeks with the pads of his thumbs. Caroline stutters out, "I-I…" She shakes her head, "No. I don't, but…I'm scared."

"Scared of what?" Stefan prompts, his hands on her shoulders running down her arms to her elbows and back up in a comforting gesture.

"Scared that," Caroline admits so quietly that Stefan has to lean in to hear, "I'm going to lose you anyways, that I'm not good enough, that I'll mess everything up, that I already did. If I never came here last night, then…" She feels a sharp pain in her chest, like a needle stabbing into her heart, and she whimpers like a wounded puppy. "I could have lived with being your friend forever, Stefan. I would have been perfectly happy. But I don't know how to do this."

"What do you want me to do?" Stefan asks, feeling desperate. _She's going to say there's nothing we can do to fix things. She's going to say we messed up too badly this time to save our friendship. _"I'll do anything you want me to, Caroline. Just tell me what it is."

Caroline considers for only a moment before requesting, "Promise me that what you're saying is true, and you aren't just saying it because you don't want me to think you're an asshole if you say we made a big mistake. I won't be mad. I just need to know the truth."

"Everything I said is true," Stefan replies without hesitation, "I promise."

"Okay," Caroline accepts his answer with a quick nod of her head. She then takes a deep breath and nods once more. She proposes, "Then there are really only two things we can do. We can either agree it was a one-time thing and try and keep our friendship as un-complicated as possible…or we can agree that if it keeps happening we're probably not going to be friends after it's all over…" She bites her lip, not really liking the sound of either of those options. Her eyes light up as she gets an idea, but when she opens her mouth to share it with Stefan she becomes insecure and changes her mind. "Or…never mind."

"Or…?" Stefan prompts, the nerves kicking in now that her decision is in the process of being made. Whatever Caroline says next will help him determine if his experiment is going to be successful or not. He wants her to suggest what he thinks she's going to suggest, but as much as he's eager for her to say the words he is dreading them also. If she proposes they give their friendship a chance to grow into something more then there's really no going back, and if this whole experiment blows up in his face it won't just be about getting a bad grade, it'll be about losing Caroline.

"It's nothing," Caroline insists, "It was stupid." _Stupider than the suggestion that we could actually be friends with benefits, _Caroline reminds herself. She wants to turn and bang her head against the wall, chanting, 'Stupid, stupid, stupid' over and over again. Why can't she be like other college girls and let a one-night-stand be exactly that? Why does she have to complicate things with her feelings? And how the hell could she be thinking about suggesting to Stefan that they have an actual relationship? He'd never go for it, and it is seriously pathetic that she's ready to jump on the opportunity. _He said he loves me, but as a _friend_, not a girlfriend! What is wrong with me?!_

Caroline feels Stefan's fingers brush against her own and she assumes it is an accident until he grasps the tips of her fingers in his hand and starts running his thumb over them one by one. She tilts her head to look up at him, curious as to why he just suddenly stepped closer to her and why he's being so touchy-feely. It's usually her that throws herself at him for a hug, or shoves her head in his lap for a nap when they're supposed to be studying, or kisses his cheek after he does something really nice for her. He's never initiated physical contact with her, not before last night, that is. She is so distracted by his hand holding hers that she nearly misses his words.

"It's not stupid."

_He doesn't know what I was going to say, so how does he know? _Caroline wonders, nearly saying so out loud. She lowers her gaze to their linked hands and then raises it to view Stefan's handsomely serious face. She wishes she knew what he was thinking right now, but all she can determine is that _he _looks pretty confident he knows what she's thinking. How can he read her so well?

"It _is_ stupid," Caroline stubbornly argues, "Even if I tell you…it wouldn't matter. It wouldn't _work_. I can see how it ends even before it starts and I am not a masochist, so I can't suggest something that is doomed from the beginning; I am not equipped to deal with this disaster."

Surprisingly, Stefan is smirking when Caroline looks to him for a reaction. He shakes his head with that sly smirk on his face and takes a step closer to Caroline. Instinctively, Caroline takes a step back to counter his action, but he moves forward two more steps. He notes, "I don't know that I've ever heard you sound so pessimistic before."

"And I don't know if I've ever seen such a predatory look on you before. You're not going to eat me, are you?" She attempts to joke, but the words she chose were so not the best words to use seeing how last night…

"Well that depends," Stefan teases, "Do you want me to?" He raises his eyebrows suggestively and Caroline feels a blush rise to her cheeks.

"Stefan," She chides while trying and failing to put more distance between them, "That's not what I meant. I don't think…we should…I thought you wanted to…?" She trails off when she realizes she can't make sense of her thoughts with him standing so close to her.

"Talk?" Stefan suggests, "Figure things out? I do, but you decided what you have to say is too 'stupid', so I think I'm going to just…" He backs her into the wall and places his hands on the wall on either side of her shoulders, "stay here until you change your mind."

"Stefan!" She says his name in exasperation this time, grabbing onto his biceps with the intent of pushing him away from her. Once her hands make contact with the hard muscles of his arms though, she realizes she kind of likes having him this close to her, so she only gives him a half-hearted shove and then gives up. Quietly, she asks, "Why do you want me to say it? You already know…"

"Because you've already determined it's not worth it," Stefan points out, "And I want to know why."

Caroline was only taking a guess when she said Stefan already knew what she was going to suggest, but she is surprised when he confirms her thoughts. She's even more surprised by the fact that he doesn't seem to agree with her that the two of them wouldn't work as a couple. _Does he really think we'd be a good match? _"We started off in the wrong way," Caroline reminds him, "and that's never a good sign."

"Being friends for seven years is a bad way to start off a relationship?" Stefan asks, his expression skeptical.

"No, of course not," Caroline argues, "But we didn't start a relationship, Stefan. We had sex. And _that's _not a good start to any relationship. It's not a reason to, either, and I don't want to do anything for the wrong reasons." She shuts her tired eyes and wishes that when she opens them things will be less complicated.

"What was so wrong about it?" Stefan queries, his words causing Caroline's eyes to fly open again, "We didn't cheat on anyone, we're adults, and I think we're allowed to decide who we want to have sex with. It didn't feel wrong to me."

"The only thing wrong about it is that you don't like me like that, Stefan! You care about me as a friend, nothing more, and I'm sorry but that's just not enough for me. I can't be in a relationship with you, not when I already know I'm not the girl you want –"

Caroline is cut off by Stefan's lips moving over hers. Her eyes are wide for a moment, but then she allows them to flutter closed as she feels his tongue slide across her lips. There's no argument this time; Stefan initiated the kiss, and Caroline is altogether convinced he's willing to give them a chance to save their friendship. It makes her happy, happier than she's going to admit, but she can't help feeling that it all might crash and burn.

Stefan pulls away for a breath and he smiles at Caroline. To her confused expression, he comments, "Feelings change, Caroline."

She supposes they do, because up until last night she didn't think she had feelings for Stefan either. "I guess you're right." She ponders his words and her own feelings of him and what happened last night and the kiss just now. "I know mine did." She is still sort of in disbelief over the whole thing, but she has accepted it isn't the end of the world. She didn't lose Stefan. He's right here, and if she's not mistaken, he's offered to give _them _a chance.

With another uncharacteristic smirk, Stefan prods, "So…what was that third option you had for us again, Caroline?"

Caroline half-smiles as well, "We take a chance, and…be together?" Once the words leave her mouth, she feels exposed. "But-"

Stefan puts his hand over her mouth and shakes his head, "No 'buts'. I think it's a good idea."

"You do?" Caroline asks and Stefan's smile widens. "Are you sure?"

"Caroline," Stefan sighs, "I'm sure. I'm more than sure." He says the exact thing he told her last night when she wanted to make sure he was okay with them hooking up, and Caroline takes note. He must be serious for him to say that. It makes her instantly reassured.

"Okay," Caroline confirms, "We'll take a chance then. But, just so you know, I expect you take me on a date to make things official."

Stefan's smile is so big it makes Caroline's cheeks hurt, but seeing him so happy, and happy because of _her_, makes her elated. "Of course," Stefan comments, "How does tonight sound?"

"Perfect," Caroline agrees with a dainty smile.

Once that's settled, the two finish up their coffee and bagels, and then, Caroline decides to head home to her apartment so she can shower and catch up on her sleep. She looks so carefree and content, and it isn't until after she leaves that Stefan's own carefree and content mood melts away. What did he just do? He just agreed to call his best friend his girlfriend. But he was happy about it a few minutes ago, so why isn't he happy about it now? Well, now he realizes that he may have had more influence over Caroline's decision than he should have. Was it really her suggestion, or was it his? Is this really what she wants, or is it what he wants? He's starting to think Caroline was right, and it is a hell of a lot more complicated than he thought.

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**Please Review! Thoughts on Caroline's shopping spree in LV? Damon's calling card? And what about the scene with Stefan and Caroline? I'd love to hear what you think and what you'd like to see happen next :)**

**-MissCarolineForbes**


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